Going Back to School: Tips on How To Ensure Children Are Safe.
Is It Safe For Your Children To Go Back to School?
How to ensure children are safe to return to school is a serious thought in every parent’s mind.
Back-to-School 2020 is a TIME like no other.
Gone are the jovial crowds, jostling to find the best deals on school supplies like markers, pencils, notebooks, and Kleenex.
Stores are quiet.
Silent, masked individuals move around the stores, not taking the effort to talk or make eye contact since no one can see their smile.
Stores hide their back-to-school items, uniforms, and school supplies along the back wall instead of broadcasting their sales in the front lobby.
This year doesn’t look like it usually does. The hesitance is tangible.
It’s time for school, but no one knows what that really means.
In some states, no one knows for sure when and if schools will ever start.
When educational facilities finally open their doors, what will school look like?
Parents have to make quick decisions with ever-changing situations.
They feel the weight of the world on their shoulders.
If they send their children to a traditional school, are they compromising their own health and the health of their kids, the teachers, grandparents, school workers, and staff?
The school does not just provide academics to children.
Students also learn social and emotional skills and access to mental and special needs support.
Students also have access to computers, the internet, and other vital services in a school setting.
Parents should be aware of what the school’s policies are concerning children’s safety while in school.
On the other hand, if they keep their children at home, are they separating their children from the necessary social and emotional support they normally get through time with friends?
What steps can parents take to ensure their children are safe?
How can you as a parent make the wisest choice, and how can you ensure your children are safe?
What is the parent’s role in keeping those precious little ones healthy during the back-to-school rush?
Let’s explore some tips from a parent on how to ensure your children are safe to go back to school no matter what option you have chosen.
While implementing these tips, it is my prayer that the Lord will guide you into making the right decision and I pray that the Lord protects and shields every child and family from all harm and danger.
1. Stay Updated on CDC Guidelines.
The most reliable resource to refer to when making safety-related COVID-19 decisions for you and your family is the CDC.
Being on top of CDC guidelines will help you make sure your child’s school is operating in the safest and most efficient way possible.
For the most part, you need to teach your children about the importance of wearing the mask or cloth face covering, hand washing techniques, and social distancing.
This will help guide decisions such as whether or not your child should go back to school and will help give insight into things you can do on your end to ensure they’re safe going back to school.
2. Check Your School’s Safety Policy.
In a traditional school setting, an easy first step is checking the school’s mask and safety policies in the classroom and in outdoor spaces.
Some schools are flexible about masks, only using them when absolutely vital to keep state mandates.
Other schools strictly enforce mask usage.
Some schools are going to great lengths to ensure that children do not mingle in hallways, common areas, recess, and the lunchroom.
Instead, children limit their interaction with the people in their own classrooms.
These measures can be very helpful in holding back the spread of the virus, allowing schools to easily isolate rooms that may become infected without shutting down the entire school.
Find out the school’s policy on washing hands, sanitizing equipment and high-touch surfaces, social distancing, mask usage, and other personal protective-PPE measures.
Make sure that their standards of operation are in line with the CDC’s recommendations.
3. Cleanliness During Transitions To and From School.
When your child leaves for school, make sure they are equipped with a mask and personal hand sanitizer.
Teach him or her to use hand sanitizer when on the bus and when leaving school for the day.
Arriving home in the afternoon, have a designated area where soiled school items, such as backpacks, are placed.
Your child should thoroughly wash their hands with soap and water according to CDC guidelines and change their clothes immediately after arriving.
Later, when it’s time to sign papers and do homework, treat the school items as you would any germ-laden item, such as currency.
Teach your child to wash his or her hands after using items from his or her backpack, and not to touch their eyes or face while handling school items.
Temperature Checks: You should plan to monitor your children’s health at home especially their temperature with a thermometer (not the back of your hand).
The child should stay home if they have a temperature of 100.4 degrees or greater or any signs of not feeling well.
These important steps will help keep your children safe and healthy.
4. Homeschooling.
While the CDC does not provide scientific studies that suggest that COVID-19 transmission may be low among children, they stress that this is the case when proper protocol is followed.
You may find that your child’s school might not follow the COVID-19 protocol that is the safest or most efficient.
When you choose some form of homeschooling, social distancing becomes much more efficient and effective.
If you or one of your children has a health problem that would put you at significant risk were you to contract the virus, you may find that schooling or distant learning from home is the most viable option.
Getting some homeschooling ideas can help you to effectively provide good targeted educational instruction to your children.
When you choose to keep your child at home, you may elect to hire a tutor to guide him or her through the online curriculum.
Like any babysitter, this tutor must be thoroughly vetted. Will the tutor provide effective emotional support, or will she dismiss your child’s fears and needs?
Does your tutor have plenty of thorough references, a background check, and other proof that they are safe to be around children?
After you hire a tutor, listen to your children and what they tell you about the way their tutor treats them.
Don’t just go with the flow because hiring a tutor is cheaper than a private school.
Keeping your children safe from the virus will mean nothing if they are not safe from their in-home teacher too.
6. Being a Safe Teacher-Mom.
If you choose to stay home with your children, you are poised to provide not only physical safety but also emotional health.
Who knows your children better than you do? Is anyone else more invested in their physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being than the mother herself?
You may be confident that you can provide the safety and attention your children need.
As you homeschool your children, there may be times when you become overwhelmed by your children’s daily needs.
The novelty of teaching and parenting at the same time and the question of how to entertain everyone and keep everyone engaged in learning could become challenging.
During these times of stress, it’s important to take care of yourself so that you can be present as a healthy, safe, and fun mom.
Become aware of situations and comments that trigger you or tempt you to blow your top.
Do you feel shame when you think you haven’t done enough?
Do you feel upset when your children don’t perform as well as you’d hoped?
Are you comparing and measuring your children—and yourself—to other schools, moms, and situations?
Could you be pushing your children too hard? Are your expectations too high or too low?
Since you will be home 24/7 with your children, make sure you take time away to recharge.
180 Days of Self-Care for Educators can help you understand how prioritizing your own self-care will better equip you to positively impact student learning and achievement.
Read God’s word, walk in nature, read a good book, or vent to a friend.
Make sure that you are a safe mom to your children.
7. Pour on the Healthy Touch.
No matter what option you choose for schooling your child this school season, there are things you can do to keep your child safe physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Make sure your child gets plenty of safe, healthy touch while at home.
Numerous studies have shown the critical importance of human touch to our well-being and safety.
Dr. Asim Shah, A medical doctor-MD who teaches at Baylor College of Medicine states that “touch starvation increases stress, depression, and anxiety, triggering a cascade of negative physiological effects.
The body releases the hormone cortisol as a response to stress, activating the body’s ‘flight-or-fight’ response.
This can increase heart rate, blood pressure, respiration, and muscle tension, and can suppress the digestive system and immune system—increasing the risk of infection…
‘Every single medical disease including heart attack, diabetes, hypertension, asthma—every single physical disease—is altered if you are more anxious, more depressed or if you have more mental health issues.’”
You may not think that touch has anything to do with health, or that children need touch in order to be safe.
But in reality, their immune systems and health are compromised when they are deprived of the loving hugs, high-fives, pats on the back, and other experiences they previously received at school.
This means that it will be your job to fill in those gaps.
Becky Bailey, Ph.D. promotes the “I Love You Rituals” series on youtube as a way to incorporate healthy touch into your child’s life.
The four key ingredients of an “I Love You Ritual” are presence, healthy touch, gentle eye contact, and playfulness.
Sweet and playful connecting games, explained inDr. Bailey’s book, I Love You Rituals, can help increase the bonding and safety in your home.
Make sure to look up Ashley’s Conscious Life on Youtube to learn how to use “I Love You Rituals” in a day-to-day context.
Each of these tips will help keep your children safe during an uncertain time.
Many schools provide social-emotional training every week.
At school, children learn to calm themselves, breathe deeply, solve arguments, and make friends.
Children learn how to express their frustration in helpful words and have a positive attitude towards life.
It’s important not to neglect children’s social and emotional safety.
If you choose to keep your children home from school, they may miss their friends and teachers.
You know you love your child. But how can you make sure your child knows it?
5 love languages of children will help you discover how to speak your child’s love language in a way that he or she understands.
They may miss the playground and after school activities even more.
If you send your child to a traditional school, they may feel stressed by seeing everyone in masks and by being introduced to rituals and routines that are completely foreign to them.
They may feel scared and startled by teachers who will no longer hug them, get close to them, or smile at them (due to social distancing and masks).
Social and emotional health are critical parts of safety.
Children whose emotional needs are not met are at a higher risk for anxiety and depression.
Are you listening to your children’s needs and point of view? Are you offering a comforting presence, understanding, curiosity, and kindness to your child?
These elements will improve their emotional well-being, which in turn promotes physical safety.
9. Other Immune Boosters.
The addition of immune system boosters to your daily regimen can help to ensure your children are safe at home and in the community.
In addition to healthy touch and psychological safety, there are many other simple, practical and cost-effective ways to support the immune system and help ensure your children’s safety during this volatile time.
Vitamin supplements, good nutrition, plenty of sleep, and exercise are other ways to ensure your child stays as healthy as possible.
First, help keep your children safe by boosting their immune defenses.
Vitamin C, D, and Zinc are the most popularly recommended by medical practitioners for immune system support.
All these supplements come in different forms including gummies.
Vitamin C is a well-known vitamin that helps children avoid sickness.
Second, help keep your children safe by ensuring they have plenty of sleep.
The Sleep Foundation shares, “Without sufficient sleep, your body makes fewer cytokines, a type of protein that targets infection and inflammation, effectively creating an immune response…. Chronic sleep loss even makes the flu vaccine less effective by reducing your body’s ability to respond.” https://www.sleepfoundation.org/articles/how-sleep-affects-your-immunity.
Third, emphasize exercise for your children.
Ensure that they are getting outside to move their bodies in fun ways.
In this way, it will work out for the safety and health of all involved.
10. Trusting God Brings Ultimate Safety.
One of the most difficult admissions for you as a parent to make is that ultimately, you cannot ensure that your children are 100% safe.
Stray germs could come into the cleanest environment.
The most diligent teacher could allow a safety breach.
Danger could come out of nowhere. No matter how hard you try, you can’t ensure your child is 100% safe.
Rather than becoming paranoid, we can seek God’s strength to rest in His sovereignty and love.
Ultimately, safety only comes from God.
The words of Psalm 27 describes an attitude of peaceful calm, trusting in the Lord’s protection:
“The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
whom shall I dread?
When the wicked came upon me to devour my flesh,
my enemies and foes stumbled and fell.
Though an army encamps around me,
my heart will not fear;
though a war breaks out against me,
I will keep my trust.” (Psalm 27:1-3 BSB)
The next verses explain the reason why David can have such confidence.
His ultimate request is not for protection from germs or other earthly harm.
“One thing I have asked of the LORD;
this is what I desire: to dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
and seek Him in His temple.
For in the day of trouble
He will hide me in His shelter;
(God)He will conceal me under the cover of His tent;
He will set me high upon a rock.” (Psalm 27:4-5 BSB)
Ultimately, our safety comes from God alone.
When our desire is the presence of God, we feel the security of hiding under his wings—even if we do get sick.
We should continue to work hard and do our best to keep our children safe.
But in the end, we should entrust them to the one who loves them more than we do.
And in Him, we can rest.
Praying for God’s continued blessings and guidance………♥
I can vividly identify with the feelings of loneliness and despair a mother can experience when their children leave home.
Leaving home may not just be for college. It includes when they leave to settle maritally with their significant others or postings to faraway jobs.
My desire has always been for my children to succeed in everything and to fulfill their God-designed destinies according to Isiaih 8:18 that declares that I and the children God has given me are for signs and wonders – paraphrased.
I was happily looking forward to when my last child would leave for college.
I could not see the feeling of despair and anxiety that came over me weeks before the actual day he left coming.
Letting go and adjusting to my new norm was harder than I expected.
There were days that I was enveloped by desperate feelings of loneliness.
Other days I would be so anxious about his welfare that I would facetime him at 2 A.M or other odd hours of the day and night.
When we dropped him off at his college, 4 hours away from home, our hearts were gladdened and we could sense the feeling of independence he was feeling around him.
Actually, he couldn’t wait to leave for college! He had been held down too long by these “strict” parents!
It took me quite some time to adjust to the new environment without my son.
I would still call out his name to come to give me the remote, turn the outside lights on, get me this and that, only to realize that he wasn’t there.
How can it be possible that the child that you poured your life into for so many years is gone?
My friend, if you are experiencing an empty nest, let these words from Isaiah 4:10 comfort you and give you the encouragement and strength to move on.
This article provides important keys to the empty nest: how to intentionally adjust to the new role when children leave.
These tips helped me a lot and I hope they help you too.
1. Remember the Past, But Don’t Try To Recreate It.
When your child leaves home and you are experiencing empty nest syndrome, remembering the past can make it easier to bear.
During those sentimental days just after your child leaves home, his or her whole life seems to pass before your eyes.
The tears flow as you remember every moment of your little one’s entire growing up years.
Sure, it’s been years since mud puddles, hair bows, or baby bottles, yet suddenly the past returns with an immediacy that had been drowned by the daily grind of high school, and football/basketball/track/music practice.
Suddenly, you remember; you reminisce.
In “Release My Grip, ” by popular blogger Kami Gilmour, she offers inspiration and some practical insights as she reveals the personal surprising truth she learned while knee-deep in this sacred season of parenthood.
You wish that you had treasured the memories more.
And you want to recreate them.
The important thing to remember is that your child isn’t dwelling on all the memories.
He or she is launching in excitement towards their future, or they are worried about the new environment, college, studying, textbooks, and friends.
As you ponder the past, don’t try to cling to it.
Keep your eyes on your child as he or she is right now, this minute.
What are her needs as she faces the future?
How can you thank God for the past and pray for his or her needs today?
Focus on the new prayer needs and intercede for them more.
Healthy grieving is an important part of saying goodbye to your children.
Rather than stuffing down your feelings of sadness, recognize that you sacrificed, loved, and invested for more than 17 to 18 years as you raised this child.
Your life is undergoing a major change, so don’t dismiss the pain you feel.
A journal like, “Empty Nest, Full Life Journal,” designed with ample space for writing or drawing, will help you slow down, reflect, and record your thoughts as you work through the book.
Proactively indulge in self-care practices to better take care of your spiritual, emotional, and mental health.
Essential oils are very popular now and have uncountable uses.
I personally like them in a diffuser for aromatherapy.
Another alternative use for essential oil aromatherapy is the SOOTHING AROMATHERAPY PLUSH WRAP: Sources say they relieve muscle pain & tension & promote relaxation.
This hot & cold plush wrap envelops your shoulders & neck for a customized fit adaptable to any body type.
Depending on how I feel on a particular day, I can use essential oils topically with a carrier to relieve tension and for relaxation.
Jeramy and Jerusha Clark help put your losses in words: “Loss of closeness, loss of ‘being needed,’ loss of control, loss of confidence.
You may feel like you don’t know what you’re doing.
That’s ok.
Grieve the loss of confidence and gear up for the learning curve.
God promises that you’re not alone in this; he will strengthen you and help you; he will uphold you with His victorious right hand.”
When you name your losses and take time to grieve, it will enable you to let go in a healthy way, so you don’t overburden your child with your pain.
If you fail to see the importance of lament, you will be more likely to pressure your adult child and drag him or her into your complex grief process.
It’s easy to want to hold on to your children.
Wishing you could make up for your past mistakes or have just one more breakfast together, you want to pull your child closer.
But this is the time to let go.
Take the time to grieve by yourself, with God, or with your spouse, friend, or your pastor, so that you don’t feel tempted to use your grief to manipulate your child.
3. Believe, Don’t Burden.
Speak words of honor to your adult child. Pray for them more and trust that they will be sensitive and obedient to the Holy Spirit and to hearing from God.
Rather than burdening him or her with your own expectations and dreams for them, affirm the person that God created your son or daughter to be.
Make sure your child knows that you are proud of him or her.
Speak words that lift them up.
At this point in their lives and during my personal moments of despair, I had to come to the realization that my job is to pray to Almighty God and God’s work is to answer. That right there gave me peace!
If your child is showing initiative and growth, let them know you respect their hard work.
When your son or daughter works on building friendships with fellow students in the dorm, share, “I am in awe of the way you are showing kindness and reaching out to your new friends. You are a loyal and caring person. Way to go!”
Let them know that you admire the man or woman that they are becoming.
“I respect that you are seriously thinking about this problem and feel strongly about the remedy.”
Listen to your child and admire their deep thoughts, their attempts to connect with others, their steps towards diligence, and other things.
Often, words of encouragement go a lot farther than words of rebuke.
Even when you must offer correction to your child, do so in a way that affirms your belief in the adult they will become.
Eggerichs recommends something like the following: “I believe in you. Because I believe in you and the man you are becoming, my role is to help you to be a self-disciplined man of honor,” and then going on to share the gentle rebuke.
Words of support help your adult child understand that you are cheering them on, even if they don’t fulfill your own personal expectations and career goals.
4. Support With No Strings Attached.
When you find yourself in an empty nest, it’s difficult to let go.
You have to understand who your child has become and how the parenting technique must change too.
In addition to sharing words of honor, it’s important to support your child emotionally.
Be there for them.
Make sure they know that you will always be a listening ear and a source of encouragement to them.
Send them open-ended texts that don’t demand a reply.
Surprise your child with care packages often. I did initially and still do!
Share fun facts you learned, interesting things that happened in your day, or something you are praying for in your child’s day to day life.
Ask yourself a hard question: “Deep down, is the purpose of this message to get a response, a reply, a visit, or an affirmation of love?
Or is it to show unconditional support for my child?”
Kids can often read our motives.
When we manipulate to try to get a response, a reply, or a visit, kids often feel frustrated and shamed.
Instead, speak words of encouragement that let your child see your love, your respect, and your hope in their future.
But don’t try to pressure them into seeing you or meeting your own personal needs.
5. Find New Ways to Meet Your Own Personal Needs.
Speaking of getting your own needs met, you will need to find other avenues to finding fun and satisfaction.
When you used to turn to your child for companionship, diversion, busyness, or relief from loneliness, you will now have to find other people to turn to.
This is a great time to spend extra time with God.
There are other ways to survive and thrive in your empty nest.
A job, a new hobby, or a volunteer opportunity at your church or in the community.
These can be great ways to occupy yourself and meet your need for significance and service.
Be OK with going to your child’s favorite store, coffee shop, or entertainment venue—by yourself or with a friend.
You could even text your child photos!
Another thing that helped me a lot was Face timing. My son made it a point of duty up to this day to facetime every day.
Even though he has left home, the bond is still strong.
Although it will certainly take a while, learn to be ok on your own.
If intense grief has been going on for a very long time and you can’t seem to find your identity apart from your child, feel free to find a therapist to help you with complicated grief.
6. Allow Change In The Relationship And Devote Time to Other Relationships
There’s no denying it: saying goodbye to kids hurt, and it changes things forever.
Even though you will be able to repeat some of your favorite activities, things will never be the same.
You will likely still enjoy a rich relationship with your child; you will likely get to repeat all the fun things you are longing to do: sitting and talking, going to coffee, celebrating Christmas traditions, or even performing simple tasks like ironing your son’s shirt.
Though the memories and traditions will still be there, it’s important to let go of your hope that you will be able to recreate the old days and bring back the past.
Acknowledge to yourself that things will never be the same.
Commit to starting to do those things you couldn’t do because of parenting obligations.
Reconnect with old friends – good positive friends that can build you up and explore volunteering opportunities at your local church and in the community.
Letting go of the past and of the elusive “same” that you’re hoping for is hard.
It feels like another death.
When you are able to let go of things being the “same,” you will be more open to treasuring the moments that do remind you of the old days.
Michael Anderson, in his book, Gist, explains that parental love must change over the years.
He says, “In every relationship and aspect of life, love must evolve to survive.
Bringing this child home must evolve into sending that child into the world.
Potential must evolve into limitations.
Hope must evolve into disappointment.
Perfection must evolve into reality and failure. …Our love as parents must evolve.
It might even need to evolve from a ‘would never hurt’ love into a ‘need to allow hurt’ love.”
Letting your child go certainly hurts, and your relationship with your child will never be the same.
Open yourself up to the fact that beautiful things lie ahead—even if they are not exactly like the beautiful things that lay in the past.
7. Influence, But Don’t Insist.
As parents, we feel like we know what is best for our children.
After all, when they were small, we regulated every aspect of their lives.
From the clothes they wore to the food they ate, we provided for them with wisdom and discretion.
We made decisions about their schooling, their healthcare, their nutrition, their technology, and their learning.
Now, you will likely see your child making choices that are different than the ones you would have made.
It’s easy to want to jump in and control the situation like you did when your child was a toddler.
However, Jeramy and Jerush Clark ask a probing question that reminds us of our true priorities: “What does forcing your agenda ultimately accomplish?”
Even when children are younger, it’s impossible to truly control them.
Clarks continues, “Despite daily evidence that we can’t control our kids, many of us cling to the illusion that we can protect them from doing something foolish, something hurtful, something that will seriously damage their future opportunities.”
Rather than forcing children to be what you had hoped and envisioned, try to see your child for who they really are: a person of dignity created by God.
Slow down long enough to really understand the beauty and complexity of your adult child.
Recognize the role changes that the empty nest has brought and learn to gradually adjust.
8. Rely on God for Strength And Focus on Yourself
Saying goodbye to kids is not easy.
You may wonder how you will survive your empty nest when children leave home.
The empty nest may seem overwhelming and unbearable sometimes. The word of God brings peace that surpasses understanding
Jerusha Clark gives these timely words of encouragement: “Now is the time to pay close attention to your own heart and mind…
The Holy Spirit can give you wisdom and insight, consolation, and strength.
You need those things, and you cannot manufacture them on your own.”
The empty nest may seem like it carves an emptiness in your soul that goes to your very core.
Saying goodbye to your kids leaves a void that only the Lord can fill.
But, you have to accept your child’s independence and encourage them to succeed.
The Lord offers His comforting fullness as a balm to your emptiness.
When you are weak, God comes near to help and support.
For those who feel that they cannot go on today, I pray the words of Ephesians 3:16-21:
“I ask that out of the riches of His glory He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.
Then you, being rooted and grounded in love, will have power, together with all the saints, to comprehend the length and width and height and depth of the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”
Did you catch that? He can fill you with His fullness.
And he finishes up the verse with a promise:
“Now to Him who is able to do so much more than all we ask or imagine,
according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
Saying goodbye to children moving away is no easy task. It’s not for the faint of heart.
But with God’s grace, you can make a slow and healthy adjustment.
As you learn how to survive when children leave home, you will begin to see the beauty of your new life.
With God’s grace and consistent support, you can have hope in your revamped empty nest.
Sending lots of love, blessings, and positivity your way:)
