Category: Dating

My Top 15 Best Essential Oils That Help And Heal

Post author By Joann
Post date December 9, 2020
2 Comments on My Top 15 Best Essential Oils That Help And Heal

My Top 15 Best Essential Oils That Help and Heal.

Relax and enjoy my top 15 best essential oils that help and heal!

Some individuals nowadays think of aromatherapy as just a different indulgent exercise the privileged few enjoy.

Click here for a copy of your journal to a Better YOU.

But upon taking the time to delve deeper, I have found a whole new prospect relating to the diversified uses of aromatherapy.

The popularity of Aromatherapy has risen in recent years.

In this article, you will get a better insight into essential oils and aromatherapy.

You will also learn how to identify and buy quality oils, how to dilute and use them safely for a healthier and happier you.

Take a peek at my core balancing essential oils.

This all-inclusive masterpiece has over 120 aromatherapy and EO remedies to restore mind, body, and spirit.

What exactly is aromatherapy?

Aromatherapy is the practice of using oils from plant extracts for medicinal, relaxation, and aromatic purposes.

Chiefly known for its calming properties, aromatherapy techniques also advocate the utilization of various essential oils to comfort the mind and body.

If you’ve been wondering what essential oils are, worry no more.

I’m going to give you an overview of what it is and how it can be of benefit to you and your entire family.

So, what is an Essential Oil?

An EO is a highly volatile concentrated compound extracted from certain plants.

The oils in every EO capture each plant’s scent or “essence.”

Answers to any questions you can’t get from this content can be found in this ‘essential oil tell it all.’

The associated unique aromatic compounds give each plant its characteristic essence that makes up its essential oil.

Although essential oils for the most part, are still linked to the idea of a relaxing therapeutic massage session, there are many more recent uses today.

Research shows EOs can be helpful, but people have to know how to use them correctly.

How are Essential Oils Obtained?

The most common method for essential oil production is through steam distillation.

Another method is mechanical, including cold pressing.

Once the oil is extracted, it is full of aroma.

The oil is either stored alone or in combination with carrier oils.

At this point, the oil is ready to use.

These aromatherapy shower bomb melts are Ah—mazing!

You will be amazed at the wide range of natural benefits from my top best 15 essential oils that help and heal.

15 Essential Oils That

Help And Heal

The History of Essential Oils

The application of aromatherapy with essential oils dates back to 3500 BC.

EOs have been used since ancient times to help the body and soothe the mind.

History has it that the actual birthplace of essential oils and aromatherapy as we know it today is Ancient Egypt.

Ancient Egyptians cultivated plants for their oils and used them for religious, cosmetic, and medicinal purposes.

India, China, ancient Greek, and the Romans followed suit.

Exploring herbs and aromatic plants soon became an integral part of the Indian Ayurvedic medical system.

People used essential oils in those days, mainly for relaxation, hygiene, healing, and also for general health promotion.

Today, however, many people are trying to get back to nature.

The use of all-natural essential oils for medicinal, cosmetic, and therapeutic purposes continues to grow.

Many people have found the benefits and results of using aromatherapy to be far greater than human-manufactured medications.

They, by far have fewer adverse side effects.

With the increase in health and wellness promotion, essential oils have become perfect for practicing self-care and relieving stress.

What are Essential Oils Used For?

The uses, benefits, and possibilities of EOs are endless.

Essential oils are known for their versatility of use.

Essential oils are used and may be combined with other ingredients to produce fragrances, lotions, other cosmetics, skin care and hair care products.

Now, I’m going to discuss my best EOs that help and heal.

The applications of EOs are very diverse.

Their versatility of use also is what has made them an everyday staple in many modern homes.

People most frequently use essential oils in aromatherapy through inhalation and topical application.

With aromatherapy, they are inhaled through various methods, like via the use of a diffuser container, spray, oil droplets, and steam baths.

Aromatherapy with essential oils has several other benefits in addition to a pleasant smell.

Advantages of aromatherapy oils include mood improvement, concentration, decongestion, relaxation, and sleep improvement.

Today, many spas use aromatherapy to enhance the pleasant experiences of their clients.

The use of essential oils and aromatherapy, however, does not end there.

Many other application methods include diffusers, massage oils, inhalers, baths, and teas, but are not limited to them.

Therapeutic Essential oils and oil blends can also be produced for specific therapeutic purposes, such as

-Relieving muscle soreness,

-Minimizing the occurrence of acne,

-Fighting infections,

-Treating wounds,

-Repelling insects,

-Hair growth,

-Reducing winter blisters, and much more.

Are Essential Oils Safe? Here are some Essential Oil Safety Tips

As EO popularity and market continue to grow, concerns as to whether they are altogether safe also continue to grow.

These concerns are validated by the fact that EOs are highly concentrated and potent plant extracts.

You have to be cautious and read label directions for each oil before use.

Dr. Scott Johnson empowers individuals on the safety profiles for over 200 integrative remedies with this.

Essential oils are also highly flammable substances therefore they should be kept away from direct contact with some elements.

By all means keep EOs away from elements like flames, gas cookers, candles, fire, matches, and cigarettes.

It is advised not to apply essential oils directly into the eyes, ears, nose, or other sensitive areas of the skin.

Also, keep all essential oils out of sight and reach of small children and pets.

Are you taking any supplements, vitamins or medications?

Yes, no, maybe?

If yes, then hear this.

EOs should NOT be taken by mouth because it can interact with other medications or supplements with potential damage to the kidneys and liver.

The American Association of Naturopathic Physicians advises against using EOs on babies under three months old.

Before using EOs topically, it is very advisable to do an allergy test first, and this is how you do it.

• Dilute the essential oil in a carrier oil at 2 times the concentration of oil you plan to use.

• On the inside of the forearm, rub the mixture into an area the size of a quarter.

If within 24 to 48 hours, you don’t notice any allergic reaction like a rapid onset of pain and redness of the skin or other skin irritations, you can assume it’s safe to use.

How do You Dilute Essential Oils?

Why should these essential oils be diluted?

Wouldn’t it be more beneficial to dab a few drops on your skin?

Nay, nay, please don’t do that!

EOs are highly concentrated and volatile.

They should be diluted with another safe carrier substance to make them safer to apply and, to facilitate absorption.

Some recommended safe substances include; water, carrier oils, and skincare oils like Jojoba, Argan, sweet almond, Rosehip, liquid soap, and unscented lotion.

Essential oil dilution is very important to avoid skin reactions and systemic toxicity.

Essential oils dilution guide recommendations

The National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy (NAHA) recommends a safe dilution ratio of 2.5 to 5% percent for adults.

NAHA recommends .5 to 1% (3-6 drops) dilution for babies three months and older.

Dilution rates are the amount of essential oils per one ounce of base oil.

The higher the percentage, the more likely you are to have a reaction, so it’s important to mix them correctly.

I love the versatility of essential oils.

As active advocates of alternative health therapies, we use EOs a lot in our home because of the countless benefits.

Because one essential oil can serve so many purposes, I’ve found that we have saved a lot of money making essential oils a staple in our home.

Here are my top 15 Essential Oils that help and heal and some of their benefits.

#1. Lavender Essential Oil (Lavandula Augustifolia)

Lavender Oil is an incredibly popular essential oil that can help and heal in so many ways.

It is a non-toxic and non-irritant essential oil.

It is best known for its relaxation properties.

There is a lot of research that supports lavender oil’s ability to relieve insomnia, stress, and anxiety.

But it doesn’t stop there!

Lavender essential oil, like most of the oils on this list, is a multipurpose oil.

It is believed to have anti-inflammatory, antifungal, antidepressant, antiseptic, antibacterial, and antimicrobial properties.

Lavender EO also has antispasmodic, analgesic, detoxifying, hypotensive, and sedative effects.

This purple flowering plant can soothe wounds and alleviate pain.

According to WebMD, “One small study found that lavender essential oil relieved soreness and redness for women who had episiotomies.

Another study showed that inhaling lavender essence, is believed to ease the pain from C-section childbirth.”

At home, we like to put a few drops of this oil in a diffuser at bed time.

One more way we love to use it is to add it to our massage oil or lotion.

The aroma of the lavender essential oil makes us feel relaxed, calm, and helps to ward off insomnia.

#2. Rosemary Essential Oil

Rosemary Oil comes from the rosemary herb, which is commonly used as a food seasoning.

It has anti-microbial, anti-inflammatory, and antioxidant properties, resulting in numerous benefits for hair and skin.

Research of rosemary oil has shown that it can improve brain function, specifically, focus and memory, when inhaled.

My daughter loves to add rosemary oil to her diffuser when she is studying.

She acknowledges that it makes her more focused and alert, and aids in information recall.

Many people say that rosemary oil strengthens their hair and promotes hair growth.

This is something my family has definitely experienced.

Research has even shown that it helps fight alopecia and other types of hair loss.

We have noticed a boost in our hair growth after adding rosemary oil to our hair care regimen.

We mix it with a carrier oil such as Jamaican black castor oil and massage it directly onto our scalp.

You can also add it your conditioner and other hair products for added hair growth boost.

#3. Tea Tree Essential Oil (Maleleuca Alternifolia)

Tea tree essential oil visibly smooths out the skin and reduces inflammation.

Research has shown that when mixed with a carrier oil, like coconut or jojoba oil, tea tree EO can be used topically as a lotion to alleviate acne and nail fungus.

This herbal/tea tree toothpaste has become a necessity in my morning routine.

Hygiene – my family’s favorite body wash contains tea tree oil. It helps fight body acne and leaves a refreshing feeling.

Antifungal – Tea tree oil is an excellent anti-fungal product.

It is also an excellent natural alternative treatment for yeast infections.

Natural Deodorant – Do you know that sweat itself does not smell, but it is when sweat combines with bacteria on your skin that an odor is produced?

Tea tree oil’s antibacterial properties make it an ideal natural alternative to commercial deodorants.

As an Antiseptic for minor cuts and scrapes – tea tree oil can be used to treat and disinfect minor cuts by killing bacteria.

#4. Sandalwood Essential Oil (Santalum)

Apart from being a classic, the rich scent found in many cosmetics, soaps, perfumes, and cologne’s are attributed to sandalwood oil.

It offers some astonishing health benefits as well.

One of its top benefits is the promotion of smooth and supple skin.

It also serves as a guard against skin cancer.

Sandalwood oil is widely used in Ayurveda and traditional Chinese medicine to combat acne and reduce large pores.

People believe that sandalwood can be beneficial in treating disorders like fatigue, bronchitis, anxiety, insomnia, low libido, and UTI (urinary tract infection).

It also serves to brighten and even out dull, splotchy skin.

We use sandalwood essential oil as one of the key ingredients in our DIY facial mask.

Guess what happens when you use it to steam your face?

Vibrant, sleek and rejuvenated skin is revealed.

#5. Peppermint Essential Oil (Mentha piperita)

Peppermint essential oil is made up or extracted from menthol family plants.

This is one of my favorite EOs that help and heal.

Its fresh, cool, minty scent makes it a favorite of so many people.

It can relieve tension headaches when applied topically.

Peppermint EO also promotes digestion and freshens breath.

Its menthol content and scent are both invigorating to the senses and promote alertness and energy.

I find it helpful for relieving headaches, joint, and muscle pain.

I love mixing peppermint oil into my hair products because it stimulates and invigorates the scalp.

#6. Sweet Orange Oil (Citrus Sinensis)

Sweet orange oil is associated with the Citrus family.

Just like fresh oranges, the scent is very uplifting.

It can be used for many applications.

Some of its uses and benefits include;

Lifts your mood and reduces stress
Treats skin conditions such as acne
Prevents the growth of fungi and bacteria
Reduces pain and inflammation
Relieves an upset stomach
A natural household cleaner
Adds a pleasant scent to any room
Adds scent to products like perfumes and cleaners
Gives flavor to a variety of foods and beverages

However, when used in aromatherapy, sweet orange EO acts as an excellent mood and energy booster.

I love to add this scent to my diffuser early in the morning to give myself a great start.

Another tip is to add it EO to your favorite cleanser for a refreshing effect to your morning routine.

This essential oil is a great promoter of happy and warm feelings!

#7. Lemon Essential Oil

Lemon EO is extracted from the peel of, you guessed it – Lemons.

It is one of the most widely used fruits in the world.

Not to mention that it is one of my best essential oils that help and heal.

It is a very versatile oil as you go from using it in your cleaning products to using it on your skin.

When used as aromatherapy, lemon oil can relieve morning sickness symptoms including nausea and vomiting significantly.

Research shows inhaling it can also combat anxiety and depression.

Lemon oil also has amazing skin brightening effects.

Diluted lemon EO applied topically to corns and calluses helps with the inflammation and soothes rough skin.

#8. Eucalyptus Essential Oil

Eucalyptus essential oil is one of the exceptionally soothing essential oils that help and heal.

This EO is commonly used in spas and massage parlors because of its relaxing effect.

Eucalyptus oil inhalation is also a natural proven way to relieve symptoms of cough, flu and sore throat, as it opens the airway.

I love mixing this oil with body lotions and applying it to my chest.

I also like to add it to my diffuser anytime I have cold symptoms.

Eucalyptus oil usually blends well with peppermint oil for diffusion.

#9. Chamomile Essential Oil

Chamomile EO is another oil that has impressive soothing qualities.

For centuries, it’s been used to promote healthy sleep as well as combat anxiety.

As it promotes a good sleep, I like to add this oil to my diffuser whenever I find it difficult to sleep.

Likewise, people have said it is effective in the management of eczema.

#10. Clary Sage Oil (Salvia Sclera)

Clary sage is an herb found mainly in the Mediterranean.

This EO is also known by the name “eye-bright” because it is traditionally used to treat eye related ailments.

When used in aromatherapy, clary sage is a great agent for stress relief.

Also, studies have shown that it can even reduce high blood pressure!

When clary sage is topically applied, it serves as a natural way to reduce menstrual cramps, balance, mood and emotions.

This EO can also alleviate menopausal symptoms. It supports hormonal balance.

#11. Frankincense Essential Oil

In ancient times, frankincense was often used as an incense.

Because of its uplifting and earthy scent, it is perfect for spiritual connectedness.

Hence, it was one of the gifts the wise men gave to our Lord Jesus Christ in (Matthew 2:11) in the Bible.

This oil was considered one of the purest oils of that time.

Today, frankincense is still used to improve spiritual practices, such as in prayer and meditation.

In fact, when I add this oil to my diffuser, I feel spiritually uplifted.

Frankincense EO creates an atmosphere of comfort and safety.

#12. Myrrh Essential Oil (Commiphora Myrrha)

Myrrh essential oil has long been associated with spirituality and strength.

It is also mentioned a couple of times in the Holy Bible.

Not to mention that it was one of the gifts our Lord received at birth.

Three king gifts from the Magi to Jesus Christ are still reverenced today.

Often, in combination with frankincense, myrrh was used in places of worship as incense and perfume to purify the air.

By the same token, Myrrh EO is associated with preventing the spread of contagious diseases.

Diffusing myrrh oil can also help relieve nervous tension, thereby helping you to feel stronger.

In addition, this essential oil is believed to boost immunity.

Some people also use it to alleviate coughs, colds, and soothe the digestive system.

Myrrh EO is often recommended and used as a self-care regimen for meditation and relaxation.

It is one of my best essential oils that help and heal.

#13. Cedarwood Essential Oil (Cedrus Atlantica)

Cedarwood EO is one my best essential oils that help and heal.

It has a pleasant woody aroma.

As a matter of fact, it is derived from the Atlas cedar tree.

It is useful in Ayurvedic skin care as it helps soothe skin irritation.

Cedar wood oil also helps with itchiness, and redness because it has antibacterial and antifungal properties.

#14. Cinnamon Essential Oil (Cinnamomum Zeylanicum)

Cinnamon essential oil can fill the atmosphere with a warm autumn, pumpkin pie spice scent.

This EO has a variety of health benefits related to the skin, the immune system, and brain function.

Cinnamon EO is therefore one of the most potent antifungal, antiviral, antiseptic, and antibacterial oil available today.

It is used in aromatherapy for deep relaxation to the body, the joints, and the brain.

#15. Patchouli Essential Oil (Pogostemon Cablin)

Patchouli essential oil is commonly and widely used in aromatherapy.

Mainly because it has a strong, sweet yet spicy and musky scent.

It is also used as an ingredient in incense and perfume, as well as in skin care products.

This EO is uniquely obtained from the leaves and stems of patchouli plants.

Patchouli essential oil offers various health benefits.

Not to mention it can be used for treating skin conditions like dermatitis, acne, and dry, cracked skin.

It is also said to relieve colds, headaches, anxiety, depression, and stomach upset.

How Do We Use Essential Oils?

The options of how to implement essential oils are as diverse as the benefits.

• The most common way to use EOs is through aromatherapy via straight inhalation, a diffuser, or a humidifier.

• Essential oils can also be applied to the skin and the hair.

Word of caution, though!

Because some EOs are highly concentrated, they should not be applied directly to the skin.

If you are using EO topically, it is recommended to dilute it with a carrier oil like sweet almond oil or castor oil.

Similarly, you may also prefer to use these alternative carriers or base oils;

• Olive oil • Jojoba Oil * Grapeseed Oil * Avocado Oil

• Argan Oil • Moringa Oil * Neem oil *Coconut Oil.

There are so many essential oils to choose from, that’s why the potential benefits are basically exponential!

I arrange all my essential oils in this organizer. It is suitable for travel too.

I hope this list of my favorite essential oils that help and heal can help you to narrow down your search.

Hopefully, just a whiff of their fragrance can help elevate your mood and make your day better.

There is no standardized grading system for essential oils yet, so you have to trust yourself to choose well.

The FDA does not regulate EOs, so you have to decide the best place to buy your essential oils.

In addition, some companies may falsely claim their oils are pure when they aren’t.

Reading reviews of each oil before actually buying can be helpful too.

My advice is to be sure to do your research on any brand, the company as well, to ensure that you are buying pure and good quality oils.

What do you think about my top 15 best EOs that help and heal?

Have you tried any of these essential oils?

Do you have an EO you like to use that isn’t on this list?

Why don’t you share your ideas?

Please share your thoughts in the comments section below!

Sending lots of love and positivity your way ♥.

Stay Blessed!

Medical Disclaimer.

Notes/references

Tisserand, R., and Balacs, T. (1995). Essential Oil Safety. New York: Churchill Livingstone.
Burfield, T. (2000). Safety of Essential Oils. International Journal of Aromatherapy, Vol 10.1/2
Schnaubelt, K. (2004). Aromatherapy Lifestyle. San Rafael, CA: Terra Linda Scent.
Battaglia, S. (2002). The Complete Guide to Aromatherapy. Australia: International Centre of Holistic Aromatherapy.

Dating INSPIRATION Life Style Marriage Newlyweds

Best Tips On How To Live Intentionally Everyday

Post author By Joann
Post date October 13, 2020
No Comments on Best Tips On How To Live Intentionally Everyday

At some point in our lives, we must decide to identify our purpose in life.
Related: Best reasons why we should always pray.
Living an intentional life lead towards living a purposeful life.
You must know what you want out of life for a start. Intentional living is way much more than a YOGA BURN that leads to a lighter, healthier & happier life.
It is like your personal vision. It is like taking stock of your life NOW and deciding whether the things you are investing your time and resources into are worth it.
“Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” -Carl Bard
More importantly, how do they bring glory to God? You must prayerfully ask for God’s guidance in identifying your purpose in life.
Always ask yourself, WHY am I doing this?
If there’s no reasonable WHY or if it’s difficult for example to identify WHY you are in a relationship or WHY you are spending so much time with a particular friend, or WHY you keep watching this particular show, if there’s no fulfillment at all, then guess what? It’s time to shift gears and start doing things differently.
It’s time to start making changes that will align with your core values. These changes will bring about long-lasting happiness and feelings of fulfillment
Here Are Some Tips on How to Live Intentionally.
Improve the PRESENT
Forget the PAST
Spend quality time studying the word of God and things of the Lord
Associate more with genuine children of God. Iron sharpens iron
Have a positive mindset
Be sensitive to time always. Do not waste time on anything unproductive. Time waits for no one
Here are 56 cards that offer simple and easy-to-do daily practices.
Integrate them into your life and you can have powerful results and uncover sustainable happiness. Get these mindful living card decks
Be purposeful with your time and resources
You can never pray too much. There’s always something to pray about
Your Children will be fine. Pray more. Don’t Overlook any evil. Encourage and Uplift them more
Don’t allow stress to get in the way of the good things in your life.
Teen Stress?? – Using these stress reduction cards, your TEEN will find lasting relief from stress so you and they can focus on their fabulous future!
Teach your children by example. Don’t expect them to do what you say. Let them see you practicing what you preach.
Live in the PRESENT. The past is gone. You can change and make the present and future better
Worry Less. Take your worries and anxiety to God!
Most battles are won on your knees with strategic, proactive, and progressive prayers.
Trust in God TOTALLY
Be KIND to the UNKIND
Show lots of GRACE to your spouse and children, even when they seem impossible to contain. It will pay off by HIS grace.
#1 You may also like – Powerful Monthly, Biblical Affirmations For Courageous Faith
Avoid and/or get rid of All toxic relationships
Surround yourself with friends and relationships that build you up
Think before you speak. It’s hard to retrieve bad words and the hurt they cause
Don’t live in self-pity
Don’t think or imagine that the grass is greener on the other side
No condition is permanent and no relationship is perfect. Work on !
Create purposeful and practical long and short term goals
Believe in Miracles and expect them to happen in your life and also to work for you
Honor your parents always. This is the only commandment with a promise!! Tell your children this too:)
Never give up
Be a cheerful giver. Give and don’t expect anything in return. The Lord will reward you big time!
Keep trying until you succeed. Never quit! Never give up quickly! Persevere my friend.
Don’t underestimate the power you have as a woman and the strength you have as a man.
Control your tongue
Celebrate other people’s successes in order to attract yours
Be yourself, don’t try to please people
Appreciate your spouse or fiance. Do not take them for granted
Evaluate your friends, if all you do is evil together, the relationship won’t last. The friendship will end when God changes one of you
Bring Clarity to your relationships instead of confusion. Avoid making assumptions
Learn the 12 best secrets to a long-lasting relationship
Stay away from gossip and gossipers
Have a true and reliable accountability partner
Be mindful of the media you fix your eyes and mind on
Respect whoever writes your paycheck
Forgive, forgive, forgive for your own good
Be the best you can be
#2 You May Also Like – Self Care – 17 Best Ways to Take Better Care of Yourself
Treat your body right. Take care of God’s temple. Don’t put bad stuff into your body. Stay away from bad habits
Be at ease with yourself
Respect and love your parents notwithstanding their disposition
Don’t think too highly of yourself. You didn’t make yourself
Have a budget and stick to it
Always have an emergency fund for the rainy day
Live frugally. Save, save, invest, invest
Buy what you ‘need’ not what you ‘want.’ Ask ‘why’ before you buy
My dear friends, your intentionality can only grow if you focus on being intentional. You must identify what you want, have a clear, focused picture, and an action plan.
Are you looking for ways to be intentional in your life? Are your core values based on God’s word and truths? Or anyone else’s?
I would really, really love to hear about one or two of the daily tips you plan to use from now to become more intentional. Please let me know in the comments. I will really appreciate it.

As always, I’m sending lots of love, and positivity your way. Stay continually blessed………..♥

Dating Relationships

How To Approach Your Dream Girl And Land A Date

Post author By Joann
Post date August 8, 2020
2 Comments on How To Approach Your Dream Girl And Land A Date

How To Approach Your Dream Girl And Land A Date.

What do you say when approaching a girl you would like to date?

How do you approach your dream girl?

What if she rejects you?

Using this proven tool can help get these hurdles out of the way.

In this article you will learn how to charge up your batteries, start your engines and approach your dream girl.

We are about to show you how!

She walks into the room and instantly your heart melts.

You’re not sure if it’s her smile, her confidence, or her kind demeanor, but there’s something about her that makes you wish you were closer to her.

When you think about approaching her, however, you’re stuck.

You don’t want to say the wrong words or be super awkward and turn her off.

You’re deeply afraid of being rejected, and there’s nothing more terrible than being on the other side of rejection…

This is a scenario that you may know too well.

God desires us to be whole, especially before we enter into a serious relationship.

Learn how to become the right one before meeting the right one.

“Dating for the Socially Awkward: Overcome social anxiety and gain the confidence to get the girl you desire” by Jouhzu, is a total self-improvement journey.

The thought of being with your crush brings you feelings of excitement, yet the idea of initiating things with them brings feelings of discomfort and dread.

You’ve had opportunity after opportunity to approach your dream girl and ask her out, but each time you find yourself stumbling over your words, unable to truly articulate your attraction to her.

•If you lack self-confidence out of fear, then this will keep you believing in yourself and help you in attracting a great partner.

Michael Todd in his bestseller book provides a guide to finding lasting love with a Christian approach. Here’s the link to this incredible book; Relationship Goals: How to Win at Dating, Marriage, and Sex.

Asking a girl out is a challenge for many men. The fear and anxiety of rejection is enough to make a man do without a woman he really cares for.

There’s no foolproof guide on how to ask the girl of your dreams on a date.

You have to try different approaches.

We are all blessed with a unique combination of qualities, preferences, and social styles; there simply can’t be one perfect way of approaching someone.

In any endeavor of life, the hidden teachings of Christ will teach you how you can shape your world easily and quickly.

This post is not meant to be a rule book, but rather a collection of tips you can use to better yourself and your mindset when approaching the woman of your heart.

Let’s dive into some of the tips you can utilize to approach your dream girl and probably land a date.

#1. Know Your value

The first tip on how to approach your dream girl is to know yourself and your value.

One thing a man must strive to have before they approach anything in life is a sense of self-worth.

In order to confidently approach a woman, you must know you have something valuable to bring to the table.

1 Corinthians 1:5 says that “By Him, you are enriched in everything, in all speech, and in all knowledge…”

As a child of God, you are full of worth and value.

In today’s world, men have a lot of pressures that can drive them to insecurity.

The world tends to determine a man’s value solely by how much money he has, his social status, and how many women are attracted to him.

There is barely any emphasis on his attributes, such as his character or his beliefs.

If a man does not have one of these superficial attributes, he may battle with the feeling he is not good enough for the woman he admires.

This is why it’s essential to have an internal sense of value.

Part of having self-confidence is being well-groomed. Check out these links that can help you look and feel your best:)

•Michael Todd Beauty – Charcoal Detox Deep Pore Gel Cleanser, Formulated with Highly Absorbent Activated Charcoal, Tea Tree and Botanical Extracts.

•100% Natural & Organic Beard Kit for Men Grooming & Care W/Beard Wash/Shampoo, 2 Packs Beard Growth Oil, Beard Balm Leave-in Conditioner, Beard Comb, Beard Brush, Beard Scissor.

•Every Man Jack Body Wash, Eucalyptus Mint.

You may not have all the money in the world or may not be the most popular guy in the room, but these are not things that make a person, and limit a person to external validation.

The only person’s validation you require is God’s and your own.

You are more than money or status, you are filled with kindness, valor, and intelligence, and much more!

When you understand you possess a combination of unique God-given qualities, you realize you are more than enough for your dream girl.

When you become secure in the fact that you have so much to offer, the thought of initiating a date with the woman of your dreams seems less daunting.

Women appreciate a man that is sure of himself and his God-given strengths-it’s an indication of the great partner he’ll be.

An additional word of advice though, there is a thin line between arrogance and confidence.

Being sure of yourself does not mean you should forget about the importance of being humble.

Humility and Confidence work hand in hand.

#2. Be Observant

Most people, whether it’s a man or a woman, appreciate when they feel someone took the time to notice little things about them.

Being observant to detail is another tip on how to approach your dream girl.

Whether you take note of how she takes her coffee in the morning, her favorite past time, or the genre of music she loves to listen to, using the knowledge you gain can go a long way.

Ten Secrets for the Man in the Mirror: Startling Ideas About True Happiness by Patrick Morley challenges men to get beyond the surface happiness.

A woman is most likely not going to be impressed solely by your attraction for her.

Instead, she’ll appreciate the fact that you delved beyond that attraction and endeavored to get to know her as a person.

Strike up a conversation about her favorite song or ask a question about the book she’s reading.

This is an almost sure way of communicating your interest in her without focusing solely on physical attraction.

Paying attention to details can also serve as a great way to get ideas for that date you want to ask her on.

Imagine that after careful observation, you notice your crush loves art.

Asking her out to an art museum or a painting class would be met with much more interest and enthusiasm than if you blindly suggested something else.

#3. Form a Friendship

Forming a solid friendship is another tip on how to approach your dream girl.

I know, I know. You probably rolled your eyes when you read that.

Why would you set yourself up for the awful, dreaded, friend zone? However, the key to a successful relationship is a strong friendship.

• Oprah Love Expert Reveals the Secrets For You To Have the Relationship of Your Dreams.

Earlier, we discussed how being observant could help put you in the position to ask your dream girl on a date.

Some aspects of a person, though, can’t be inferred from observation so much as it can from the regular conversation.

By forming a friendship with your potential date, you stand the chance of really getting to know her.

And by getting to know her, you increase your chances of landing a date.

There’re even more advantages to forming a friendship with your crush: A friendship tears down walls and creates comfort.

Remember when you first met your ideal woman and how hard it was to form complete sentences around her?

Maybe with time, it got a little easier to say a few words, although the thought of asking her on a date still makes you anxious.

With time and continued proximity, you got a little more comfortable.

Imagine if you two formed a friendship. That type of bond would definitely make you feel more comfortable around her and allow you to be yourself.

When we approach each other in a climate of friendship, we do not have the pressure to be accepted or rejected.

•She gets to learn more about you.

Friendship is not only an opportunity for you to learn more about your dream partner, but also an avenue for her to get to know you.

Perhaps you have common interests or admirable strengths.

Perhaps you have quirks or mannerisms that she could find adorable.

A friendship is an opportunity to present who you are without the added pressure to perform. It’s an organic, healthy way of allowing all aspects of you to shine.

•You get to see if there is actual compatibility.

For the longest, you’ve admired your crush from afar.

You’ve observed some things, had a few conversations here and there, but every interaction has been only on the surface.

You don’t know enough about her to gauge whether you’re genuinely a match.

While dating is a way to gauge if there is an affinity for one another, a friendship does the same, but with an added benefit- there is no pressure.

When you decide to pursue a genuine friendship, you don’t have to worry about performing or making grand gestures that may not be organic.

#4. Show Her The Respect She Deserves

Romans 12:10 says to “Love one another with brotherly affection.”

It is essential to treat all of our fellow humans with respect, and this extends to your dream girl or woman you want in your life as well.

In a world full of patriarchy and misogyny, women don’t always get the respect they deserve.

Unfortunately, some women end up with dates and partners who also won’t extend that respect.

RELATED: How to know if you are in a toxic relationship.

The number one way to turn a woman off is to show clear disrespect for her and her boundaries.

Without love, the woman reacts without respect, and without respect, the man reacts without love. This initiates a painful and negative cycle in any relationship.

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs’ book on love and respect is a great resource for anyone interested in a long-lasting relationship.

This is the link to the book – Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs.

Every woman is different and has their own code that they live by. It is your responsibility to acknowledge that code and do your best to honor it.

Failure to do so can make you lose the possibility of dating your dream girl, and worse, can land you in big trouble.

#5. Be Genuine About Your Intentions

People have different intentions for asking their dream girl on a date.

Perhaps you are looking for friendship, a casual date, or are looking to pursue a full-fledged relationship.

It’s essential that you are honest to yourself and to your woman of interest about your intentions for asking her out.

RELATED: 12 Best Secrets to a long-lasting relationship.

Don’t put on a charade because you feel it’s the only way to get her to go on a date with you.

Riches and honor and life are the remuneration of humility and of the fear of the LORD. – Proverbs 22:4.

Dwight Moody talks about how God promotes honest and humble men in his book, “Daniel, Man of God: Being a Man of Character in a Babylon World.”

While this can get you the date, you’ve wanted, it can have disastrous results as well.

In his book “No Excuses,” Dr. Tony Evans “urges men to stop looking at their circumstances as excuses and instead to see them as challenges and opportunities for success.”

Be a man of honesty and integrity, and you will attract the woman of your dreams!

#6. Invite Her To Church

One way to get a good woman to gravitate towards you is to include her in personal activities that don’t have an air of expectation.

One great way to form a friendship and easing communication between you and your crush is to invite them to church with you.

It can be something more intimate such as a bible study, or it could be a mid-week or a Sunday service.

This is a good time to get a good study bible –NLT Life Application Study Bible, and a daily devotional-New Morning Mercies: A Daily Gospel Devotional specifically for men.

This is a great way for you to connect with her on a spiritual level.

The 5 Love Languages for Men: Tools for Making a Good Relationship Great by Gary Chapman teaches you how to master what matters in a relationship.

Maybe you could connect over your mutual love for similar worship styles.

Or perhaps the pastor’s topic of the day could strike up a deep conversation.

Most importantly, inviting her to something personal and intimate like a church is an excellent way of communicating how important she is to you.

You wouldn’t invite just anyone to church with you, to be amongst you and the people you fellowship with.

This is a great segue to asking her out because when you do, she’ll know it’s not just a superficial date you’re asking for; you really want to connect with her on a deeper level.

#7. Communicate Clearly

Always work on being the best communicator you can.

When you do get around to asking your dream girl on a date, it will take clear communication so she can have a good idea of what your intentions are.

Good communication is one of the things that keeps a relationship intact.

This best seller with excellent reviews offers the best tips on crucial conversations. Here’s the link; Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High.

Whether you strike up an initial friendship or simply ask her out, good communication is key.

Sometimes, being an excellent communicator is hard for people because of the amount of vulnerability it entails.

Most people have a fear of opening up themselves to rejection or being the subject of negative judgment, so they tend to avoid directly communicating their wants, feelings, or thoughts to protect themselves.

Unfortunately, there is no set way of avoiding rejection or negative judgment.

When you open yourself up to someone, you’re taking a risk. However, the potential gains from clear communication greatly outweigh the potential losses.

Communicating clearly ties back to your security in who you are as a person.

When you are confident in who you are and know your value, it’s easier to put yourself in a vulnerable position.

Regardless of the outcome, you know that you are a man of valor, and any woman would be lucky to go on a date with you.

If they accept it, excellent. If they don’t, it’s their loss.

A good woman will have a deep appreciation for a man who is willing to go out on a limb to communicate his intent and feelings.

Don’t hesitate to communicate clearly. Be true to yourself and to what you feel in your heart.

#8. Just Do it- Ask her out!

Your dream girl could end up being your soulmate.

She could end up being the partner that God created for you.

Dr. Tony Evans, in his book, Kingdom Man, Every Man’s Destiny, Every Woman’s Dream, is a guide that empowers men to rise up without intimidation to take up their God-ordained roles.

But you will never experience that if you don’t ask.

Step beyond your fears and doubts and go for what you want.

No one ever got the love of their life by just standing idle.

Put yourself out there, and if it is meant to be, it will be!

I’ll end this post with some pick-up lines that are sure to lighten the mood.

Maybe you can use one of these lines on that special someone!

“Last night, I was reading the book of Numbers, and I realized I didn’t have your number.”
“Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives … He never met you!”
“I didn’t know that the angels were flying so low. “
“I’m not Joseph; maybe you can help me interpret the dreams I had about you?”
“Is it hot here, or is it just the Holy Spirit burning in you?” “
“How many times do I have to turn you around for you to fall in love with me?” “
“I didn’t believe in predestination before today.”
“Is it a transfiguration? Because you are radiant. “
“Excuse me, but I believe that one of your ribs belongs to me.”
“Is it a sin to have stolen my heart? “
“What is your name and number for me to add you to my “prayer list? “
“Normally, I am not very prophetic, but I can see us together.”

Asking out the girl of your dreams does not have to be a scary, daunting task.

The tips here can help you to approach your dream girl with success.

This post was meant to remind you that you are a great catch, and God has blessed you with wonderful qualities any good woman can appreciate.

Strive to be the best person you can be.

Learn to be a good communicator, to be sensitive and attentive, and to be completely confident in who you are.

Do not allow fear of rejection to hold you back, and always remember that what is meant to be will be.

What are some other tips that can help a man secure a date with his dream girl?

Be sure to comment below, and don’t forget to share this post if you enjoyed it!

*Sending some positivity and blessings your way…….

Dating Marriage Newlyweds Relationships Relationships

How To Maintain A Happy and Healthy Relationship – 9 Cs

Post author By Joann
Post date July 23, 2020
1 Comment on How To Maintain A Happy and Healthy Relationship – 9 Cs

9 Cs to a happy and healthy relationship

A Happy and Healthy Relationship that is Good, Sweet, and Long Lasting is Possible!

But they can’t be bought, people have to intentionally make it happen.

The following tips can help you and your partner create and maintain a happy and healthy relationship.

Let’s dive in.

She gazes at a diamond ring through eyes filled with tears of joy and hope.

He stands on the stage, promising to love his new bride with all his heart, for the rest of his life.

As they walk down the aisle amidst cheers of congratulations, the happy couple sees their future spreading before them like the endless sparkling sands of a good tropical paradise.

Crystal waters lap softly on the beach of their life, while palm tree shades them from above.

Life is good; their hopes have come true.

The Disney ideal of “happily ever after” has come to their own doorstep to stay.

But only a few months later, after the newness has worn off, many couples find themselves staring at the sands of their life in confusion.

Most couples begin to wonder if they’ve been dumped on a deserted desert island rather than a tropical seaside resort.

They realize that they packed for a vacation, whereas real relationships are the adventure of a lifetime.

Expecting nothing but fun, happiness, romance, and fulfillment, most have made very few preparations for marriage.

They expected a beach vacation—not a wilderness survival camp.

The good news is that no matter what stage you are at in your relationship, you can always gain new tools and skills.

As a participant in the wilderness survival shows on television, you can still choose the carefully selected tools you will need to brave the white-waters of life with your spouse.

Most happy and healthy relationships have certain characteristics in common.Your relationship can be strong, meaningful, fulfilling and exciting if you understand and practice these basic and proven principles.

As you gain the abilities you need to overcome danger and adversity, you will find joy, even in the most remote and desolate deserts of life.

“When you pursue God’s purpose as a couple, then everything else you value in life – such as happiness, love, and satisfaction – will fall into place.” – Dr. Tony Evans. Kingdom Marriage.

Nine C’s of a Happy and Healthy Relationship are Crucial Resources for Every Couple’s Survival.

Each individual C is a tool for your tool belt as you launch into life’s adventure with your spouse.

1. Commitment

The first C on how to maintain a happy and healthy relationship is Commitment.

No one would survive the wilderness without commitment.

The kind of person who bails after the first stubbed toe or splinter is not the person that would be chosen for these reality shows.

Braving the wilderness requires an unvarnished commitment to continuing to work toward surviving and thriving.

In the same way, good relationships take work, perseverance, and the willingness to stand up under difficult circumstances.

First Corinthians 13:7 says that “love… endures all things.”

The Greek word “hupomeno” means that we experience difficulty with calmness and bravery.

“Tough love” is commonly used to refer to rebuke, discipline, or natural consequences, but it can be used in another way in relationships.

Tough love is a kind of love that is strong, durable, and stands the test of time.

It’s not like dollar-store tableware or a cheap toy that breaks with the first use.

It doesn’t quit or fall apart when the going gets rough and tough.

In the words of a pastor with many years of experience, love must keep “going through times of difficulty with a determination to continue.”

2. Communication is the Second C of a Happy And Healthy Relationship

Imagine what would happen to a team of wilderness survivors if there were no communication.

Food was being carefully rationed, but the team leader forgot to communicate this fact to the other team members.

Imagine the frustration and anger—and danger—that would ensue when the leader discovered that a large proportion of their food had been consumed.

Communication is essential in relationships of any kind.

Mike Bechtle said, “Watch for baby elephants in the room. If you let them stay, they’ll get really, really big.”

In other words, the “elephant in the room” starts small, and it is vital to communicate regarding uncomfortable issues before they grow unmanageably large.

The Bible stresses the importance of good communication.

James 1:19 says, “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” ESV

This verse emphasizes that relationships should provide an environment where each person feels safe.

Friends and spouses should provide a proven track record of listening to each other’s concerns

so that each person feels safe bringing issues into the light in a timely manner.

When communicating, dig a little deeper than you think you have to.

Don’t just tell your partner that you’re upset that he or she never looked up from his or her computer while you were talking to them.

Steve Call encourages people to ponder their frustrations long enough to become aware of past hurts and vulnerabilities that may be making your partner or friend’s behavior seem intolerable to you.

If you were ignored consistently by your parents, being ignored by others in your life may be a particularly painful experience for you.

Mentioning these dynamics to trustworthy friends and partners can help communication stay open and honest.

3. Compassion

After you have communicated with your spouse or friend, compassion is critical.

We need to treat the story they have shared with honor and dignity.

Seeing others’ perspectives is critical to successful relationships.

If your friend or spouse shares a personal story or trigger related to their frustration with you, Reject the temptation to say,

“Well, too bad. Get over it. I’m not the person who hurt you.That’s not what I meant.”

Instead, take a moment to see the situation through your spouse’s or friend’s eyes.

Speak with kindness, acceptance, and understanding.

Jesus provided an excellent example of compassion in the way he treated others.

Matthew 9:36 says, “When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” NLT

The phrase “moved with compassion” means that Jesus felt compassion in his gut, in his inner being.

Despite his followers’ confusion and helplessness, Jesus loved them deeply.

Your spouse or friend may be confused in their anger and frustration. They may be helpless against the triggers of past pain.

Our reaction should not be anger and hatred. Our reaction should be and should exhibit compassion.

4. Compromise

After you and your friend or spouse have communicated about the reasons behind your frustration and demonstrated empathy and compassion for one another, it is important to find a middle ground.

Consider our example of an individual who experienced visceral fear and abandonment when her friend didn’t look up from her computer.

Communication can lead to compassionate and helpful compromises.

Her friend or partner who was in the middle of a work project on the computer could verbalize; “I am working on an important work project with a deadline.

Could I finish a few more paragraphs? After that, I will give you my undivided attention.”

James 3:17 says that Godly wisdom is ”peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others.”

Compromises are needed on a desert island: the priorities, opinions, and perspectives of each person must be taken into consideration.

In the same way, compromising with others’ wishes in relationships is a sign of maturity and wisdom.

5. Courage

Few people have escaped from harm.

In this sin-tainted world, everyone has been a victim of abuse, hurt, betrayal, or harm of some kind.

Especially in cases where a partner has been abused in the past, Dan Allender discusses the intense courage necessary to walk into the “waters of death.”

It takes bravery to wade through the “confusion, suspicion, darkness, and betrayal” that past harm has brought to the relationship.

In an article on the 9Cs of how to maintain a happy and Healthy Relationship, it is appropriate to mention the courage required to wade into the “seas” of darkness and harm in any relationship.

Imagine a survival team that was required to swim through a poisonous chemical spill in order to make it to shore.

Most would do all they could to avoid this difficulty.

But if the chemicals had polluted the only avenue to safe harbor, they must dive in–no matter the cost.

The words, “Love… bears all things” have become almost cliché, rolling off our tongues at weddings or offering catchy words to put on a Teddy bear poster.

But if we take a moment to pause and consider these words from 1 Corinthians 13:7, we realize that they have a deeper meaning.

The word “bears” in Greek means “to cover closely (so as to keep water out).”

Envision yourself carefully covering your struggling friend, or partner with a waterproof jacket as you swim through those sordid waters to bring them safely to the shore.

This act takes courage, a vital element in any successful relationship.

6. Confidence

Another emphasis from 1 Corinthians 13 is that “love believes all things.”

Clearly, God does not encourage us to believe every fragment of information that we find on the internet or every false claim that a deceiving and conniving spouse wants to lead us to believe.

But there is one person that we can believe all the time: God.

“God is the cord that not only keeps you together but also keeps you strong and able to do all He has designed for you to do and enjoy.” -Dr. Tony Evans. Kingdom Marriage

Do we believe that God has the power to heal this relationship?

Also, do we give others the benefit of the doubt, believing their word whenever we can?

Do we have confidence in the other person, trusting that they will resolve this issue to the best of their ability?

Or do we approach the other person with doubt, assumption and suspicion?

A seasoned pastor once said that believing all things means that we “believe all things related to beauty and truth.”

It means “crediting the best motive in each other and directing others to Christ with their sin, believing that anything is possible with the work of God.”

When we support others in this way, we will often experience growth and resolution that we never dreamed possible.

7. Covenant

Poisonous chemicals, starvation, and isolation are tough.

But nothing beats the destructive power of a hurricane.

These deadly storms have the power to rip apart the strongest of buildings.

In life, what will keep your marriage intact during the storms of life?

When typhoon gales beat against your marriage, nothing less than a covenant will hold it together.

Dr. Tony Evans in his book, Kingdom Marriage said; “Marriage is not merely a social contract; it is a sacred covenant.

It is not simply a means of looking for love, happiness, and fulfillment.”

Marriage is a Covenant, not a Contract.

A contract is an agreement made between two parties because they fundamentally distrust one another.

Business partners make contracts with one another to hold each other to their word in case of a disagreement.

Contracts are based on limited liability, seeking to protect one’s self from harm or infringement.

If both parties decide to change the terms of the contract, they can modify it at any time.

A covenant, however, is based on endless trust and security.

It cannot be broken when one of the parties wishes to change the terms.

A marriage covenant is created before God and is permanently indissoluble.

In Malachi 2:14, ESV, God mourns the broken marriage covenants of his people:

“The LORD was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant.”

God takes marriage covenants seriously because he takes His own covenants seriously.

The covenant God made to Israel – ie -US could not be broken, even when Israel wished to desert God and follow other lovers.

Startlingly, God could not even break His own covenant, even when it cost Him endless pain and betrayal.

Centuries later, He still holds out His promise of love to His chosen people.

The New Covenant, won through Jesus’ blood, welcomes trusting sinners into a relationship with Him.

He is their husband, and they are His beloved and beautiful bride.

God emphasizes to us that He will never abandon us or break His covenant.

The God that created us wants a marriage relationship to be a reenactment of His powerful covenant to us.

8. Companionship

Can you imagine the difficulty of surviving in a vast wilderness—alone?

All you have is yourself, your gear, and the wide-open sky full of danger and promise.

Now imagine that even one friend joins you in your survival experience.

A friend who encourages you, supports you, laughs with you, spends time with you, and lifts your spirits when the going gets tough.

In any human endeavor, companionship is key.

Humans were created by God to live in relationships with one another.

In his book, Reconnect, Steve Call makes this memorable statement: “Play together to stay together.”

His prescription for marital struggles is playing together three times a week for ten minutes.

Playing could involve sitting together to drink coffee and watch the sun go down.

It could involve watching a movie, going on a bike ride, giving a simple hug, or talking about things that are mutually enjoyable.

Even though relationships are hard, the difficulty doesn’t have to have the final word.

Make time to enjoy your spouse or friend. Play together.

Provide companionship.

9. Caring Shines Like the Sun

The last of the Nine C’s on how to maintain a happy and healthy relationship.

Caring shines like the sun peeking out from behind storm clouds.

Make time to enjoy your spouse or friend. Play together.

Caring is the sweet rainbow after the rain, but it can be overlooked.

To know that someone cares about you is one of the most powerfully motivating forces in the universe.

Life can be tough sometimes, and it’s easy to throw up our hands in despair:

“I don’t even care,” we may grunt.

When storms beat through our desert island and destroy the Hollywood dreams we once had, it’s easy to become cynical, cold, and calculating.

“Like I cared,” we snort to the broken pieces of our dreams, floating out to sea.

That’s when the powerful words, “I care,” become so crucial.

“I care about our relationship.”And, “I care about the way you feel.”

Or, “I care about how I hurt you and how I can do better.”

Also, “I care about your hopes and dreams. I simply care.”

If someone cares, life is no longer unmanageable.

Lovingkindness breathes courage up our spines.

We feel like there’s nothing we can’t do if we know that someone cares.

As you practice the Nine C’s of a Healthy and Happy Relationship, the rigors of survival begin to seem less fierce and threatening.

You will start to find the hills exhilarating, the mountains breathtaking, and the open skies welcoming.

Your love for each other becomes a shelter from the rain and a fire to warm chilled spirits.

As you cover one another with love and companionship, you’ll find that the challenges become lighter and that both of you become braver.

We wish you the best of luck on your adventure together.

Why not start today to implement the 9 Cs?

As always – Sending lots of love and blessings your way………..

Tags communication in a relationship, covenant marriage, how to be happy in a relationship that you are not happy in, how to increase love in a relationship, how to keep a relationship happy forever, how to keep a relationship strong and happy, kingdom marriage, secrets of happy couples, strong relationships quiz, strong relationships tips, tips for building a healthy relationship

Dating Marriage Newlyweds Relationships Relationships

12 Best Secrets To A Long Lasting Relationship

Post author By Joann
Post date July 23, 2020
No Comments on 12 Best Secrets To A Long Lasting Relationship

12 Best Secrets To A Long-Lasting Marriage

Relationship.

Do you Even Know What it Takes to Make Your Relationship Last Long?

Every long term happy marriage has secrets to their success and what has kept them together.

While some couples enter their marriage relationship with starry eyes and rosy glasses, others enter with a bleakly realistic fear:

“What if our marriage falls apart? What if we don’t have what it takes to stick it out?”

With marriage relationships falling apart left and right and warm and devoted marriages disintegrating before our very eyes, we need words of advice, guidance, and strength.

We need to gain skills for endurance and going the distance.

What makes the difference? What helps some people weather the storms of life and stay strong long term?

Ever wondered – what are the secrets to a long-lasting relationship?

In this post, we will examine some important life lessons for building long-lasting marriage relationships.

RELATED: Best Biblical Marriage Advice for Newlyweds – 31 + Tips.

Let’s have a look at twelve of the best things people (including myself – 34 years of marriage) who have stayed together for the longest share as perhaps, some of the secrets to their long-lasting relationships.

Let’s explore some great advice for a strong, happy, and enduring relationship.

#1. Personal Conversation Is Very Vital

Have Clear Boundaries With Technology

In her excellent book, Reclaiming Conversation: the Power of Talk in a Digital Age,

Sherry Turkle explains that smartphones, computers, and technology have taken the place of much-needed personal conversation that is so vital to healthy relationships.

As digital innovators work harder and harder to capture our attention,

we can be sucked into the trend to outsource our thinking, our information storage, and recall, our memories, our information processing, and our philosophy to digital devices.

In fact, instead of taking time to fully digest our multi-sensory experiences with our spouse, we often short-change the experience by focusing only on taking a picture to later post on social media.

Instead of using our own minds to store, process, and retrieve our memories about our spouses,

we rely on the crutch of social media to remind us of memories and anniversaries.

Similarly, instead of spending time conversing about our day, developing new hobbies together,

or responding to one another’s bid for attention, we spend time scrolling endlessly through social media feeds or online news and shopping.

The writer of Ecclesiastes, despite his tone of darkness and despair, had a lot to say about the importance of treasuring each and every moment that God gives us here on earth.

He often reminded readers that life is uncertain; tragedy and calamities come, and death is sure.

In light of this, he advised, alternatively to,

“Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun–all your meaningless days.

For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.”

Ecclesiastes advised his audience to treasure the simple pleasures of daily life.

Don’t allow the marvels of a smiling face, a fading sunset, or a nuanced expression of tenderness be lost under a pile of addictive, stressful, and never-ending tweets, likes, comments, and headlines.

Sherry Turkle suggests creating “sacred spaces—the living room, the dining room, the kitchen, the car—that are device-free.”

However, you choose to apply this principle, remember that boundaries on technology are a very important part of a relationship that can go the distance.

#2. Be Prepared For Difficulty

It is important to understand that marriage may not be easy.

Jesus says that “in this world, you will have tribulation.”

Trouble and trials are guaranteed.

One or both of you may get sick.

You may encounter great challenges, financial setbacks, children who choose another path, tragedy, or loss.

Maybe, you may have to care for your spouse long term in a nursing home with Alzheimer’s.

These could create states of anxiety and fear.

Buckle your seatbelt for a challenge and prayerfully stay committed to sticking it out, no matter what.

A relationship with a strong foundation built on agape love can withstand any trials and tribulations.

#3. Hope For The Best

Hebrews 10:36 says, “So do not throw away your confidence; it holds a great reward.”

Although you prepare for the worst, you must enter your marriage relationship with hope, confidence, optimism, and the power of imagination.

Paul Tripp says that the spiritual “power of imagination” is the confidence that allows us to envision leaves, flowers, and fruit on a dry, dead, winter tree.

The power of imagination allows us to dream of business goals that we later make a reality.

Similarly, the power of imagination helps us see that no matter the current or pending difficulty, God is always at work in our spouse’s life.

Even in times of difficulty, we can work on “believing that anything is possible with the work of God.” (Pastor H, Kansas)

Tim Keller in his renowned book “The meaning of Marriage” encourages spouses to use their spiritual imagination to get excited about what God is doing in their partner’s life.

He says, “Look at another person and get a glimpse of what God is creating, and to say,

‘I see who God is making you, and it excites me! I want to be part of that. I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to His throne.’

And when we get there, I will look at your magnificence and say, “I always knew you could be like this.

I got glimpses of it on earth, but now look at you!’” (The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller)

Always approach your marriage with hope in the fact that God is; “able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us.” -Ephesians 3:20

#4. Practice Steadfast (Hesed) Love

Make Jesus Christ, the first and last and best in everything.

Throughout the Bible, God refers to His love for His people as “hesed.”

Hesed love means love, loyalty, or steadfast mercy.

It refers to a covenant love that never, ever gives up on the beloved.

Paul Miller says that “Hesed is one-way love.

It encompasses love commitment without an exit strategy.

When you love with hesed love, you bind yourself to the object of your love no matter what the response is…” (The Loving Life by Paul Miller)

Hesed love is the type of love that will keep your relationship going for the long term.

#5. Find And Stay With A Congregation That Will Support You

Long-lasting relationships can’t happen in isolation.

You need a strong body of genuine believers that will come alongside and help you through those tough patches.

They will help you see blind spots, guide you in times of difficulty, and encourage you when times are tough.

The body of Christ provides accountability and helps keep you on track with your relationship with your spouse and with God.

Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “Let us not neglect meeting together, as some have made a habit, but let us encourage one another, and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

Spiritual fellowship helps you avoid placing all your emotional weight on your spouse, which creates an impossible burden to bear.

Find solace in friends, mentors, accountability partners, pastors, and teachers.

The Body of Christ is an important key to developing courage and perseverance for the long haul.

#6. Develop Relationships With Older Mentors

Proverbs 27:10 says, “Never abandon a friend— either yours or your father’s.”

This verse implies that we gain strength and wisdom from learning to know people our own age and our parents’ age.

Seek out an older couple who has an exemplary, happy, and long marriage and explore what has kept them together.

Ask them to share with you the secrets of how to stay strong long term.

Learn from their marriage advice and wisdom and follow their example.

They may even be able to give you practical advice for the specialized situations you experience with your spouse.

#7. Don’t Ignore Your Spouse’s “Bids” For Attention

In his book, Reconnect, Steve Call, Ph.D. says that couples are constantly sending out “bids” for attention.

Like a slight nose-scratch or cough from a bidder at an auction, some of these bids are subtle and hard to notice.

Nonetheless, spouses are constantly asking one another for connection in small ways.

It’s very important to notice and respond positively to your spouse’s bid for attention.

For example, if they hint at going out to eat, taking a walk, chatting about the day, or playing a board game,

make sure you don’t brush off this small invitation.

Notice their “bid” for attention and respond with kindness.

By any chance, if you’re not available right then, make sure you schedule another time when the two of you could connect.

If you make a habit of dismissing or ignoring your spouse’s bids, she or he may stop asking, and your relationship will suffer.

#8. Focus On “Crock Pot Relationships” Instead Of “Instant Microwave Relationships.”

In our culture of instant availability, it’s easy to assume that following a few steps, pressing a few buttons, and learning a few “hacks” can help you develop a successful marriage.

However, relationships are one thing that never develops instantly.

No matter how quickly you may have fallen in love, “love at first sight” doesn’t ensure that your relationship will progress easily and automatically.

RELATED: Small Love Gestures that Keep A Relationship Going.

Mike Bechtle says, “There are no shortcuts to maturity.

There are no shortcuts to healthy relationships. Maturity takes time.”

#9. Face Shame And Contempt Head On

According to Dan Allender, “a loyal commitment to a zero-contempt relationship” is one of the most critical elements in any marriage.

Especially when there has been vulnerability or hurt in the life of one spouse, a no-contempt rule is critical.

Dan Allender goes on, “No matter the issue, no matter its importance, contempt must be viewed as dangerous as lighting a match to look into a gas tank.”

In order to understand contempt, we need to also examine the shame in our lives.

Shame is the fear of disconnection and abandonment that stems from our belief about who we are as a person.

When we feel shame, we often turn to contempt to distract us from those feelings of abandonment and disconnection.

Instead of learning to feel secure in our identity, we blame someone near us or show contempt for ourselves.

#10. Don’t Allow Conflicts To Gridlock

The Gottman Institute provides excellent food for thought when it says that in some conflicts,

resolution is not necessarily possible in the way we traditionally think of it.

Solvable conflicts are simple logistical challenges or differences of opinion that can be fixed by discussing them.

Unsolvable problems, however, are clashes between personalities or values that will come up over and over ago and will never truly go away.

Some couples work endlessly to try to solve these problems, running themselves into corners, becoming defensive, being angry, or shutting down.

John Gottman, Ph.D suggests approaching these issues with continuing dialogue.

He recommends “humor, affection, and even amusement, to actively cope with the unresolvable problems,

rather than allowing it to fall into the condition of gridlock.” https://www.gottman.com/blog/managing-conflict-solvable-vs-perpetual-problems/

You must understand each other’s weaknesses and recognize your differences and practice forgiveness and letting go.

Being honest about unsolvable problems can help you not to waste time and energy worrying about things that cannot be changed.

Don’t allow these issues to go into a stressful, discouraging gridlock.

If your conflicts have fallen into a state of gridlock, make sure to reach out for help to a counselor, therapist, pastor, or friend.

Your marriage is worth fighting for!

#11. Re-Enact Jesus’ Life

You may think that all of life is going to be an upward of success and victory.

However, Jesus calls us to the life of death, self-sacrifice, and love that he demonstrated while he was on earth.

Ephesians 5 specifically says that husbands are called love with self-sacrificial, dying love.

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25

In his book, J-Curve, Paul Miller emphasizes that dying with Christ is a big part of life.

We admire Jesus’ sacrificial love so much that we actually re-enact it daily.

Practice sacrificial love that is enveloped in the mutual respect that promotes your shared values.

This is a great virtue that can serve as a bedrock of any relationship.

Respect is the bedrock of any solid relationship. It’s impossible for any relationship to thrive without RESPECT.

Like the residents of Medicine Lodge, Kansas, who re-enact a historic peace treaty in a monumental pageant every three years, we are called to re-enact Jesus’ life of sacrificial love—not every three years, but every day.

“When you realize that death is at the center of love, it is quietly liberating.

Instead of fighting the death that comes with love, you embrace what your Father has given you. A tiny resurrection begins in your heart.”—Paul Miller

Don’t forget or underestimate the importance of intimacy in your relationship.

Intimacy should be emotional, mental, and physical closeness and not just sexual.

You must always make time to connect intimately.

This type of intimacy is a feeling that is much more deeper and solid than a romantic feeling. This is one marriage advice all couples in long term relationships agree to be one of their secrets.

Whether your marriage is hanging by a thread or healthy and strong, The Love Dare is a journey you need to take. You will learn the keys to finding true intimacy and developing a dynamic marriage.

#12. Regain Perspective As A Couple

When you start your marriage, it is important to create habits and rituals of connection.

Take time to regain perspective as a couple!

It’s important to think through your schedules, priorities, weekly events, and check-ins.

However, it is equally important to reevaluate those goals, rituals, and habits often as the years pass.

Don’t just get into a habit and continue with it for 20 years without taking a step back to see if those routines are still necessary.

Periodically review your goals, values, habits, and customs.

See if these rituals are working for you and evaluate whether you should change them or add new ones.

Although routines are important, ruts are not always helpful.

Make sure to check in from time to time to make sure you are still on the same page.

Life isn’t easy, and marriage is not for the faint of heart.

With these proven secrets to a long-lasting marriage relationship under your belt, you will gain the perspective, courage, and endurance that you need.

They will help you learn how to stay strong and intentional and long-term in your “Kingdom Marriage“.

Secrets To A Long Marriage Relationship: Words To Live By Everyday:

You can post these words where you can see them often.

Remembering them will help you and your partner to maintain a happy marriage that can withstand the most associated challenges.

-PATIENCE.

-UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

-FORGIVENESS

-KINDNESS.

-PERSEVERANCE.

-RELENTLESS.

-INTENTIONAL.

-MOTIVATED.

-COMPASSION.

-INTIMACY.

-GRATEFUL.

-MERCY.

-GRACE.

-MEEKNESS.

-COURAGE.

-HONESTY.

-RESPECT.

-TRUST.

-EMPATHY.

-FOCUSED.

-POSITIVE EMOTIONS.

As Always, Just hang on tight. Do Your best and leave the rest to a Faithful God. STAY BLESSED……

Tags commitment, how to fix a long-term relationship, how to make a relationship last long, kingdom marriage, long distance relationship, long-lasting relationship tips, marriage relationship, married, secrets to a long lasting marriage, Staying Married, strong relationship tips, Tony Evans, what is the secret to a long marriage, What makes for a lasting marriage

Dating Family INSPIRATION Marriage Newlyweds Relationships

Best Uplifting Quotes To Brighten Your Day

Post author By Joann
Post date July 22, 2020
6 Comments on Best Uplifting Quotes To Brighten Your Day

Sometimes, you may find you need some uplifting words that can brighten your day.

You may need reflective words or words of wisdom – an uplifting quote that can bring about a much-needed change or pull you in a better and more positive direction.

Find a comfortable spot like this to reflect on these words.

Words are powerful.

An uplifting quote can serve as a guiding light to self-enlightenment and productivity.

Well-articulated quotes can kindle fresh determination, inspiration and hope. They can trigger new perspectives and bring relief.

Here are some of my favorite uplifting and motivational quotes.

There are some that are specific for marriage relationships and they have a ♥ by them.

Here’s a link to a must-have book for all married couples.

There are specific and focused quotes towards the end for husbands and wives. You can’t miss those!

I’ll continue to update this list as I find more inspiration, so please keep checking back for more uplifting quotes!

If any of these quotes have blessed you in any way, please do not hesitate to share them with your friends and family.

Please share with me in the comments section at the end of the page what your favorite uplifting quote is!

It is my prayer that they would help you in a remarkable way along your journey to better relationship experiences and to encourage you to stay sensitive and intentional.

Here we go, the best uplifting inspirational quotes to brighten your day.

“We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.” -Frederick Keonig

“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.” – Helen Keller

♥“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short.” -Andre Maurois

♥“The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make – not just on your wedding day, but over and over again – and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife.” -Barbara De Angelis

“Kindness has no religion. Religions are like narrow tracks, but kindness is like an open sky.” – Amit Ray

“Every morning when I get up, I ask God what he wants me to do, ask Him to lead me to the right people to help them.”– Richard Simmons

“Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in mind.” – David G. Allen

♥“Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.” – Martin Luther

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” – Helen Keller

♥“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. -1st. Corinthians 13; 3-7 NLT

“Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose” – Bill Gates

Powerful monthly Biblical affirmations for courageous faith is another resource that elevates the spirit daily. Check it out.

“Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses.” – Lao Tzu

“When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?” -Thich Nhat Hanh

♥ “If love cannot stand the test of time, then it has failed the test of love.” – Bernard Byer
“What I write comes from a place of deep love, and a deep understanding of all kinds of otherness.” – Jacqueline Woodson
♥ “Love is not finding someone to live with. It’s finding someone you can’t live without.” – Rafael Ortiz
“When God puts love and compassion in your heart toward someone, He’s offering you an opportunity to make a difference in that person’s life. You must learn to follow that love. Don’t ignore it. Act on it. Somebody needs what you have.”― Joel Osteen, Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential♥” True love is eternal, infinite, and always like itself. It is equal and pure, without violent demonstrations: it is seen with white hairs and is always young in the heart.” -Honore de Balzac
“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down”. – Oprah Winfrey
“Love is begun by time, And time qualifies the spark and fire of it.” – Shakespeare
“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” – Henry Ford
♥“What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility.” -Leo Tolstoy
“When you face adversity, you need to remind yourself that whatever is trying to defeat you could very well be what God will use to promote you.” ― Joel Osteen, Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential
♥ “Love is everything it’s cracked up to be. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for.” – Erica Jong
“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, But fools despise wisdom and instruction.” – Proverbs 1:7 NKJV
♥“Great marriages don’t happen by luck or by accident. They are the result of a consistent investment of time, thoughtfulness, forgiveness, affection, prayer, mutual respect, and a rock-solid commitment between a husband and a wife.” – Dave Willis
♥“Marriage is sharing your life with your best friend, enjoying the journey along the way, and arriving at every destination together – Fawn Weaver
You may also like the 12 best secrets to a long-lasting relationship.
“Quit worrying about how everything is going to turn out. Live one day at a time; better yet, make the most of this moment. It’s good to have a big–picture outlook, to set goals, to establish budgets, and make plans, but if you’re always living in the future, you’re never really enjoying the present in the way God wants you to.”― Joel Osteen, Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential.
♥“A marriage cannot survive when we think only of ourselves. We need to recognize that to love someone is a choice, not a feeling. – Christin Slade
♥“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” –Proverbs 18:22
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” – John 3:16 NKJV
“Words are powerful, speak wisely.” – Unknown
“Think before you speak. In the heat of the moment. It’s easy to say something you’ll later regret.” – Dr. Anil Kumar Sinha
“Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” – 1 John 4:11 NKJV
“Your desire to succeed should be driven by the need to fulfill your God-given purpose and not attract the praise of men.” –Tolu Thomy
“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.” – Brene Brown
“Let your past make you better, not bitter.” -Unknown
♥“When couples focus on remaining two while God is seeking to create oneness in them, they are inadvertently working against His purpose.” – Dr. Tony Evans
“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Words travel far more than we can ever reach across hearts and live longer than we can ever live on earth and as such, should be spoken with a lot of goodness in them.” – Terry Mark
“Be sure to taste all of your words before you spit them out.” – Unknown
“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napoleon Hill
“Purpose is that power that will propel you to get out of bed in the morning and push you to make your dreams come true.” – Unknown
“Never underestimate the power to change you.” – Walter Ngele

♥“I have known many happy marriages, but never a compatible one. The whole aim of marriage is to fight through and survive the instant when incompatibility becomes unquestionable.” – G.K. Chesterton
“Sin and Hell are married unless repentance proclaims the divorce.” — Spurgeon
“The truth carries a weight that no lie can counterfeit.” – John Hagee
“Today, if you are feeling overwhelmed, Jesus Christ is the rock who is high above your circumstance.” – Joel Osteen
“Righteous bumper provides motivation to push through difficulties.” – Dr. Charles Stanley
“Attacking the successful does not delete your failure.” – Dr. Pastor Paul Enenche
“Time changes, but truth never change.” – Unknown
“Children of today, there’s no benefit in rebellion.” – Dr. Pastor Paul Eneche
“Favor is the secret to uncommon blessings. Favor is the difference between your present and your future.” – Prophet Nanasei Sarkodie

“No matter what the matter is, you will matter when it matters most.” – Dr. Chris Okafor
“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, all play and no work makes Jack a poor boy.” -Unknown
“Dwelling on negative thoughts is like fertilizing weeds.” – Normal Vincent Peale
“When you appreciate the insignificant, you attract the significant.” – Skip Prichard
“Stop being jealous of people in their winning season. You don’t know what they lost in their losing season.” – Unknown

“Failure in education is not a failure in life. Failure is by determination.” – Unknown
“What you believe is what you become.” – Unknown
♥Where you go, I’ll go, where you stay, I’ll stay. – Ruth 1:16
The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. – Deuteronomy 31:8
“We are most grateful for life’s mountain tops when we have experienced life’s valleys” – Skip Prichard
“I want peace, happiness, not only for myself, for everybody.” – Fela Kuti

“It is better to be a fool for Christ than a hero for the world for the times of the world will pass away, but the blessings of Christ will endure forever.” – Pastor John Hagee
“You are creative, you are alive, you are the stuff life is made of. What else could possibly matter?” – Iyanla Vanzant
“Don’t you dare allow personal fear to limit what God will do in your life.” – Pastor Mathew Hagee
♥“What makes a marriage strong is loving with a biblical love grounded in patience, kindness, loyalty, grace, and more, which is in alignment with God’s covenantal purpose for marriage“. – Dr. Tony Evans

“Five Daily Reminders: 1. You only fail if you quit 2. Everyone’s journey is different 3. Things always get better with time. 4. The past cannot be changed 5. Happiness is found within” – Unknown
“The man who is powerful FEARS nothing; not even God. The powerful man loves God, but FEARS him never! Enduring power never grows out of FEAR. Any power that is built upon FEAR is bound to crumble and disintegrate. Understand this great truth and you will never be so unfortunate as to raise yourself to power through the FEARS of other people who may owe you temporary allegiance.” – Napoleon Hill
“Nothing works unless it originates from God.”– Unknown

♥“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning, and unquenchable.” – Bruce Lee

“Life is about keys when you have a key, you don’t knock, you open the door.” – Archbishop Nick Duncan-Williams

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” – Walt Disney

♥ “If you can’t do anything about it, then let it go. Don’t be a prisoner to things you can’t change.” – Tony Gaskins
♥ “God never said that the journey would be easy, but He did say that the arrival would be worthwhile” – Max Lucado
You may also like the best marriage advice for newlyweds – 31 tips.
“God will meet you where you are in order to take you where He wants you to go.” – Dr. Tony Evans
♥ “Remember who you are. Don’t compromise for anyone, for any reason. You are a child of the Almighty God. Live that truth.” – Lysa Terkeurst
“If you can’t fly, then run, If you can’t run, then walk, If you can’t walk, then crawl, but whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.” – Martin Luther King Jr.
“Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.” – Francis Chan
You may also like the 4 Sentence Prayer That Instantly Grants Your Heart’s Fiercest Desires.
“The Christian life is not a constant high. I have my moments of deep discouragement. I have to go to God in prayer with tears in my eyes, and say, ‘O God, forgive me,’ or ‘Help me.’” – Billy Graham
“There is a reason the windshield is bigger than the rearview mirror. Your future matters more than your past.” – Max Lucado
“Your potential is the sum of all the possibilities God has for your life.” – Charles Stanley
“The greater your knowledge of the goodness and grace of God on your life, the more likely you are to praise Him in the storm.” – Matt Chandler
“The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; and, he will exult over you with loud singing.” – Zephaniah 3:17
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” – Deuteronomy 31:6
You may also like tips on how to intentionally pray for and with your children.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” – Matthew 11:28
“God is love. He didn’t need us. But he wanted us. And that is the most amazing thing.” – Rick Warren
♥“Christian marriage does not exist for the benefit of the two people in the marriage; it is for the benefit of the world, that God would be glorified in it. The main purpose of marriage is not the enjoyment of the two people who are married, the main purpose of marriage is to glorify Christ as we participate in the mission of God.” -Tim Suttle

Biblical Caution

Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. Philippians 2:4 NLT

“Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” -Galatians 6:2 NLT

^“Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.” – Proverbs 22: 24-25 NLT

“Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character.” – 1 Corinthians 15:33

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it, is like wrapping a present and not giving it. – William Ward

“The opposite of love is not hatred; it’s indifference.” -Elie Wiesel

For Husbands

The Christlike husband is not supposed to be mean, harsh, provoke, or ill-treat their wives.

They are to love their wives as they love their own bodies. Would anyone ever harm their own bodies?

Be patient with your wife. Women go through some emotions that are peculiar to them, sometimes we do not understand it ourselves.

As her first responder, instead of being nonchalant, be kind and understanding. It takes very little or few gestures to please a woman.

You will progress more if your wife is 100% on your team. You are the head of the household, stay proactive, focused, and intentional, and do all you can to keep your home moving in the right direction.

If you become passive and the wife takes over, please don’t complain and call her liberated and disrespectful.

You cannot hold your wife to a standard or accountability that you will not hold yourself to as well.

Blessings to you, the great man of valor!

♥“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church.” – Ephesians 5:28 NIV

♥ “Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” – Colossians 3:19 NIV

♥ “Husbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” – 1 Peter 3:7 NIV

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” – Proverbs 27:17

“Home is where everyone comes for respite and rest, but if a home environment does not provide the love that children need, then they will seek it elsewhere. ” – Nicoline Ambe, Being Dad

For Wives

The kingdom wife is supposed to respect (reverence) their husband.

They are expected to control their emotions and not nag, belittle, insult, talk negatively or gossip about their husbands, or bring them shame by the way they live at home or in the community.

Some men like to be respected for their intelligence and physical strength.

Some women look at it as “ego.”

Hey ladies, if all it takes for him to be the kingdom man you want is to respect his intelligence and physical strength and boost his ego from time to time? Please, by all means, do it!

♥ However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. – Ephesians 5:33 NIV

“I love you not only for what you are but for what I am when I am with you.” – Roy Croft

♥“Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” – Proverbs 31:11-12 NLT

♥“She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” – Proverbs 31:26-27 NIV

“Compassion is like a mother giving love to her children. Mother’s ways are higher than others, even when everyone rejects, mother accepts with her arms open and wide.” -Amit Ray

“When I am frustrated with my husband and feel like giving up on us, I have two choices. One: I can choose love and work on my marriage or, two: I can choose to love and work on my marriage.” -Darlene Schacht

“For our home to be a refuge it needs to be a place where love, compassion, and patience prevail.” – Allan Lokos, Patience: The Art of Peaceful Living

Encouragement

^♥Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

^♥Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? – Ecclesiastes 4:11

♥“You don’t fall into love. You commit to it. Love is saying ‘I will be there no matter what.’” -Tim Keller

^♥So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.– 1 Thessalonians 5:11

♥For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them. – Matthew 18:20

♥ As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.
– Proverbs 27:17

♥“Conflicts are not a sign you’ve married the wrong person. They simply affirm you are human.” -Dr. Gary Chapman

Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near. – Hebrews 10:24-25

“Your mind is the only thing you can control exclusively. Don’t give it away too freely through useless arguments.” – Napoleon Hill

“Excellence is the best deterrent to racism or sexism.” – Oprah Winfrey

♥“Love is supposed to be based on trust, and trust on love, it’s something rare and beautiful when people can confide in each other without fearing what the other person will think.” – E.A. Bucchianeri

“And now these three remain faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.” -1 Corinthians 13:13

Do you have a favorite quote you would like to share? Please let me know in the comments.

Please don’t forget to share! Get your free printable version of quotes below.

Sending lots of Blessings, Love & Positivity your Way…………♥

Dating Relationships

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP

Post author By Joann
Post date July 21, 2020
2 Comments on HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP

Toxic relationships exist and they are dangerous for your physical and mental health and wellbeing.

Have you ever wondered if your relationship is toxic to your overall wellbeing?

Are you beginning to feel things are not the way they are supposed to be in your relationship?

Maybe you are beginning to feel like you deserve better!

Many times, toxic relationships are hard to identify, but it’s also easy to identify behaviors that are blatantly out of line.

You may be asking: how can I make my relationship strong? Here are 16 ways to make your relationship stay strong.

Rainie Howard offers ways of escape in this resource; Addicted To Pain: Renew Your Mind & Heal Your Spirit From A Toxic Relationship In 30 Days.

Why is it so hard to leave an abusive relationship? Why is it so hard to move on?

In this article, we are going to show you some signs that signal an unhealthy and toxic relationship.

Many of us have gotten ourselves into situationships!

Quite frankly we often tend to stay in these relationships even when we know that we’re getting all the red flags to leave or demand changes.

Not only that, but we also continue to allow others to step on our hearts and feelings when we have the choice to leave.

According to John Mark Green; “Toxic people attach themselves like cinder blocks tied to your ankles, and then invite you for a swim in their poisoned waters.”

I get it, sometimes it’s confusing because you find yourself in a love-hate relationship.

Toxic people give you hopeful moments of happiness and moments of unexplainable deep stress and distress.

And you think that is the ideal way love is supposed to be, but it’s not at all.

Sadly though, many times before we get our Moses, we have to go through a couple of the Pharaohs.

No one can boast of a perfect relationship, in the personal or the business sphere.

But “The wrong person will give you less than what you’re worth, but that doesn’t mean that you have to accept it.” – Sonya Parker.

According to Ginnie Love Thompson, Ph.D., a Florida based Psychotherapist, “Every single relationship has a level of abuse. Nothing is perfect – there’s always some work to be done.”

For the most part, a good relationship should make you feel secure, special, happy, cared for, respected, and free to be yourself.

My friends, true love will never leave you feeling empty, drained, depleted and distraught.

And if for any reason you do? Then you’re in a toxic relationship.

A California – based communication and psychology expert, coined the term in her book Toxic People, defined a toxic relationship as “any relationship (between people who) don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other, where there’s disrespect and lack of cohesiveness.”

Let me tell you a couple of ways to identify if you’re in an unhealthy toxic relationship.

If any of these sound familiar, it’s time to make some big changes.

“Don’t settle for a relationship that won’t let you be yourself.” – Oprah Winfrey

The first sign of a toxic relationship is Confusion.

As God’s word says, “God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.” (1 Corinthians 14:33).

It is always good and very important to pay close attention to identify if the person you are in a relationship with is bringing clarity or confusion to your life.

When a person continues to give you less effort and is also showing signs that he/she doesn’t want to “get serious” about a relationship, then they are most likely wasting your time.

They expect much and give little. They feel entitled and act like they are doing you a favor.

If you don’t know where you stand with someone in a relationship, then you should let that person go.

Trust me, also believe that there is always someone out there who will not leave you confused.

The second sign of an unhealthy relationship is Dishonesty

If your partner is constantly lying to you, you are discovering little lies here and there, telling a partial truth, or doesn’t even communicate his/her whereabouts, these are all big red flags.

When you are in a relationship or dating, you should know that HONESTY is the first sign of loyalty.

Honesty breeds TRUST over time in a relationship.

Always consider if the person you are with is honest about EVERYTHING.

Most toxic people don’t follow through on their promises. They are “sweet and smooth talkers.”

They say one thing to make you happy this one moment and then revert to their old ways.

Rachel Sussman, LCSW, a marriage and family therapist in New York, says “There’s the constant push and pull.”

Every dishonest gesture between partners undercuts a little bit of the relationship.

The third sign of a toxic relationship is fairly easy to identify.

No Commitment – If the person you are with doesn’t want anyone to know they’re dating you, then you’re pretty much a secret and he/she is liable to do anything.

They don’t talk about the future after you’ve been together for some months or they are comparing you with their past relationships.

They are not committed, period! And that’s a BIG red flag.

No, they don’t have to post you on social media 20x a day, but it should be made known that they are in a relationship with you.

Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t always guarantee that they will be faithful, but it does give clarity that they can potentially be honest.

It shows they value you as a person.

Dr. Clinton McLemore― a leading expert on interpersonal relationships― gives you a powerful roadmap for promoting healthy and productive relationships and how to have some value for your relationship.

You may already know this, but if your partner is DISRESPECTFUL, this can be a huge red flag.

Being disrespected in a relationship causes much emotional confusion and distress.

Mutual respect fosters individual growth and development.

Lack of respect messes with your image and gives you a sense of insecurity about yourself.

Lack of respect does not bring out the best of you.

In fact, it makes you not feel like yourself around them.

You see, when a man/woman tells you very hurtful things, those things don’t just go away, they stay grounded in your heart for some time.

Better to be with someone that will build you up, even when you don’t feel or look your best.

Here’s one that most people don’t take into much consideration – Uneasy Feeling.

Follow your intuition, if you feel like something is off or you are feeling any type of anxiety and fear in a relationship or anything in general.

Listen to that small voice!

Most times our inner selves will tell us the truth before it surfaces.

I think, a lot of times, most of us know when something is off, but we choose to find out the hard way.

Listen to that small voice in your head. God will never lead you wrong.

A sixth Sign that you’re probably in an unhealthy relationship would be a Lack Of Change In Behavior.

Let me give you an example, if a person constantly does the same thing over and over without changing.

And he/she knows that it bothers you, then they clearly don’t care about fixing the problem, or making you happy.

A person can apologize, but if their actions don’t match, then something is not adding up.

When they are wrong, they try to rationalize their behavior or blame others for it.

True Repentance should come with a change, they say!

Dependence would definitely be another sign of an unhealthy relationship.

Do not get me wrong, it is okay to take care of your partner.

But when taking care of your partner becomes a full-time job and they are not putting in the same effort, then you are basically dealing with a child with all related stresses.

Do not sacrifice your time and efforts on a selfish and self-centered person.

By all means, don’t.

Some people will be in a relationship with you just because it’s beneficial for them, while the whole time you could be losing out on an amazing partner who will give you the world and more.

Don’t settle for someone who is full of excuses as to why they are not where they are supposed to be because anyone can support themselves if they are willing.

Now I think it’s time we get on the topic of Abuse; another sign of signs of a toxic relationship.

There is more than one kind of abuse. There’s physical abuse, mental abuse, and narcissistic abuse.

If you’ve ever encountered any of these types of abuse, I just want to let you know that you are worth so much more!

Mental abuse is the first sign of these 3. Why?

Because once you allow a person to abuse you mentally – control your mind -which can be verbal – arguing, disrespect, or just their actions, this will eventually lead to physical abuse.

Sometimes people hide what they really feel behind words and hidden agendas until they get comfortable enough to abuse you physically.

Physical abuse could lead to death. No, I am not being dramatic.

If you are in a relationship where you are getting abused, at what point do you think the abuse will end and at what point do you think this person will stop?

There’s never an excuse for abusive behavior, especially when it comes to love in a relationship.

Love is the strongest drug and if you are with a person who is seriously in love with you, but abuses you, at no point does that make it right?

None, for neither of you!

Leave that relationship as quickly as possible, especially when you are not yet married.

Lastly, Narcissistic abuse is the most underrated type of abuse out there.

This is the silent abuse.

This is where the person will have you thinking you’re doing everything wrong in the world, but you’re doing everything you possibly can to the best of your ability.

They mess with your mind. You can’t impress them.

“Beware of narcissistic people. They’ll tell everyone you’re crazy, only to cover up their trickery. ” ― Mitta Xinindlu

“Narcissists are very retaliative if they believe another has achieved what they desire, exposed their insecurities, or refused to be under their control.” — Lorraine Nilon

I think most people have gotten a piece of this kind of abuse.

Not only because it’s so easy to miss, but also because it plays with your mind in so many ways, and most importantly it is a disorder.

Trust me it is very torturing.

Here’s a couple of signs that you’re in a narcissistic relationship:

You have low self-esteem, you feel as though you’re going crazy, you become depressed or anxious.

Nothing you do is ever good enough.

When you try to leave they pull you back in, their attitude towards you changes rapidly.

Guys, this is only a couple ways a narcissist abuses you and I think it is the most horrible of them all.

Beware of these toxic relationships! They are very hard to recover from. Not impossible, but hard!

Now that we’ve discussed the different types of abuse in a relationship, we should move forward with other signs that indicate you’re in an unhealthy relationship.

Which brings me to Control.

If you are dating someone who seems to be very controlling you should be careful, controlling people want you to do exactly as they say or else… and this is not a safe place to be.

When you’re in a relationship, it should be equal, even though a man is dominant over the woman he should never make you feel as though you don’t have a choice or a voice.

You should still be entitled to do what you want and have some sense of independence as long as it isn’t disrespectful towards your relationship.

One thing we all ignore is our Own Comfort in a relationship.

If you don’t feel comfortable without makeup or wigs, etc, then you aren’t with your soulmate,

You see real true love should not be identified by how good your makeup looks, or how laid your hair is,

but when you can wake up barefaced, and 100% natural, you’ve found someone that accepts you for you!

Don’t ever change your image to be with someone.

Beware of the person you’re with is charming when they want to be, real love should always be present, not just sometimes.

Real love is Unconditional. It shouldn’t be based on performance.

If they are more charming to everyone else than you, then you probably have yourself a cheater.

Never stay with someone if they make you feel ignored and invisible.

In a toxic relationship, nothing gets resolved.

Most discussions end in arguments. There’s zero tolerance and accommodation for the other person’s feelings.

They always assume the worst of the other person.

It is one thing to say you’re in a relationship with someone that you’re uncertain about,

but it is a completely different thing to be with someone who doesn’t even give you the attention you deserve.

Trust me, someone who really wants to be with you will not make you feel ignored or left out.

They will always make time and always check-in, busy or not.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church.

Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loves the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:22-25.

This is a clear biblical representation of how God intends for us to love each other in a marriage relationship.

God did not intend for us to be in relationships where our hearts are being abused, our love is taken for granted, and our images distorted.

That’s not biblical!

That is what the devil wants. Satan wants us to be abused and broken, but God wants us to be loved and made whole.

The word “perfect” in 1 John 4:18 means “complete” or “mature,” and the love that is referred to is God’s, selfless agape love.

An unconditional love that is not based on performance.

This is the type of love that should exist in every relationship.

It’s sacrificial love – bearing one another.

At no point should we doubt that unhealthy relationships are all that God has in His plan for our love lives.

God wants the best for each and every one of us, and I think we should want the best for ourselves as well.

If we stop settling for less, God will truly give us a Kingdom man/woman.

Pastor Joel Osteen once said that everything you need to be happy is in you.

Happiness is a choice and should not be dependent on somebody else.

“The hardest part of being in an emotionally abusive relationship, it’s actually admitting you’re in one.” – Anna Akana

When you are with someone who persistently makes you unhappy, suffocates those precious parts of you, makes you feel lesser than who you are,

you must be alive with your eyes wide open to the damage they are doing.

You owe them nothing, you owe yourself everything.

Everyone deserves to thrive, to feel no intimidation, and to feel safe, and you deserve to be happy in your relationship.

Don’t allow yourself to be in toxic relationships.

You should be able to identify signs that indicate that a relationship may have become, or always was, toxic.

Sometimes you just have to learn how to be alone and patiently wait for true love to find you or vice versa – Most of the time when you least expected it.

Soulmates are real, and you will be at peace when your true soul mate comes into your life.

If you know how much God loves you unconditionally, then you will know how much he cares about your situation.

Lastly, are you:

Currently, trying to get over a heartbreak?

Are you trapped in a toxic relationship?

Do you desire to leave a toxic relationship?

It is possible!

When you have tried all you can, you just have to make up your mind and heart that you will not accept that anymore.

With prayer, self-care, people that care, and self-love, you will overcome any phase you are going through.

Sometimes telling yourself that; I’m going to stay positive,

Believing that God created us with a great destiny, and

conditioning our minds to rely on God’s plan,

We feel better, we attract better, and we are living again.

Don’t get so consumed in an unhealthy relationship until it starts to affect your mental health.

It’s like a low-grade fever that may eventually evolve into a high fever.

When you really stop and think about it, a toxic relationship brings about some levels of fear and anxiety.

These could lead to depression and feelings of hopelessness.

12 best secrets to a long-lasting relationship will help you to identify the good attributes of a healthy relationship.

It’s not too late to let go and start new. All you have to do is try.

“The broken heart will heal and you will have peace like never before.”
― Tracy A. Malone

The best is yet to come.

Wishing you all the best in your relationships and sending tons of love and positivity your way!

Blessings……..

Tags ending toxic relationships, healthy relationship, how do you know if you are in a toxic relationship, Reconciling a toxic relationship, secrets to a long lasting relationship, self care, Signs of a toxic reilationship, toxic husband, Toxic relationship, toxic relationships psychology, toxic wife, warning signs of a toxic relationship, what is a toxic boyfriend, what is a toxic girlfriend, what is a toxic relationship, women's health

My Top 15 Best Essential Oils That Help and Heal.

Relax and enjoy my top 15 best essential oils that help and heal!

Some individuals nowadays think of aromatherapy as just a different indulgent exercise the privileged few enjoy.

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But upon taking the time to delve deeper, I have found a whole new prospect relating to the diversified uses of aromatherapy.

The popularity of Aromatherapy has risen in recent years.

In this article, you will get a better insight into essential oils and aromatherapy.

You will also learn how to identify and buy quality oils, how to dilute and use them safely for a healthier and happier you.

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This all-inclusive masterpiece has over 120 aromatherapy and EO remedies to restore mind, body, and spirit.

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What exactly is aromatherapy?

Aromatherapy is the practice of using oils from plant extracts for medicinal, relaxation, and aromatic purposes.

Chiefly known for its calming properties, aromatherapy techniques also advocate the utilization of various essential oils to comfort the mind and body.

If you’ve been wondering what essential oils are, worry no more.

I’m going to give you an overview of what it is and how it can be of benefit to you and your entire family.

So, what is an Essential Oil?

An EO is a highly volatile concentrated compound extracted from certain plants.

The oils in every EO capture each plant’s scent or “essence.”

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The associated unique aromatic compounds give each plant its characteristic essence that makes up its essential oil.

Although essential oils for the most part, are still linked to the idea of a relaxing therapeutic massage session, there are many more recent uses today.

Research shows EOs can be helpful, but people have to know how to use them correctly.

How are Essential Oils Obtained?

The most common method for essential oil production is through steam distillation.

Another method is mechanical, including cold pressing.

Once the oil is extracted, it is full of aroma.

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The oil is either stored alone or in combination with carrier oils.

At this point, the oil is ready to use.

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You will be amazed at the wide range of natural benefits from my top best 15 essential oils that help and heal.

15 Essential Oils That

Help And Heal

The History of Essential Oils

The application of aromatherapy with essential oils dates back to 3500 BC.

EOs have been used since ancient times to help the body and soothe the mind.

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History has it that the actual birthplace of essential oils and aromatherapy as we know it today is Ancient Egypt.

Ancient Egyptians cultivated plants for their oils and used them for religious, cosmetic, and medicinal purposes.

India, China, ancient Greek, and the Romans followed suit.

Exploring herbs and aromatic plants soon became an integral part of the Indian Ayurvedic medical system.

People used essential oils in those days, mainly for relaxation, hygiene, healing, and also for general health promotion.

Today, however, many people are trying to get back to nature.

The use of all-natural essential oils for medicinal, cosmetic, and therapeutic purposes continues to grow.

Many people have found the benefits and results of using aromatherapy to be far greater than human-manufactured medications.

They, by far have fewer adverse side effects.

With the increase in health and wellness promotion, essential oils have become perfect for practicing self-care and relieving stress.

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What are Essential Oils Used For?

The uses, benefits, and possibilities of EOs are endless.

Essential oils are known for their versatility of use.

Essential oils are used and may be combined with other ingredients to produce fragrances, lotions, other cosmetics, skin care and hair care products.

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The applications of EOs are very diverse.

Their versatility of use also is what has made them an everyday staple in many modern homes.

People most frequently use essential oils in aromatherapy through inhalation and topical application.

With aromatherapy, they are inhaled through various methods, like via the use of a diffuser container, spray, oil droplets, and steam baths.

Aromatherapy with essential oils has several other benefits in addition to a pleasant smell.

Advantages of aromatherapy oils include mood improvement, concentration, decongestion, relaxation, and sleep improvement.

Today, many spas use aromatherapy to enhance the pleasant experiences of their clients.

The use of essential oils and aromatherapy, however, does not end there.

Many other application methods include diffusers, massage oils, inhalers, baths, and teas, but are not limited to them.

Therapeutic Essential oils and oil blends can also be produced for specific therapeutic purposes, such as

-Relieving muscle soreness,

-Minimizing the occurrence of acne,

-Fighting infections,

-Treating wounds,

-Repelling insects,

-Hair growth,

-Reducing winter blisters, and much more.

Are Essential Oils Safe? Here are some Essential Oil Safety Tips

As EO popularity and market continue to grow, concerns as to whether they are altogether safe also continue to grow.

These concerns are validated by the fact that EOs are highly concentrated and potent plant extracts.

You have to be cautious and read label directions for each oil before use.

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Essential oils are also highly flammable substances therefore they should be kept away from direct contact with some elements.

By all means keep EOs away from elements like flames, gas cookers, candles, fire, matches, and cigarettes.

It is advised not to apply essential oils directly into the eyes, ears, nose, or other sensitive areas of the skin.